学好英语幽默小品

Today’s Yang bailao and Huang Shiren ———编剧：方彦龙 Character:：杨白劳Y,喜儿X,王大春（喜儿男朋友）D,王大婶（王大春的母亲）W,穆仁智（黄的管家）M,黄世仁H Part 1:In 杨白劳’home 旁白：(“喜洋洋”背景音乐起)---New Year's Eve,Xi’er is talking with her boyfriend on the phone,suddenly ,doorbell sounded.（叮咚!叮咚……） 喜:Oh!ok!Someone is knock at the door!So I have to hung up!Bye!（开门） 杨:喜儿!喜儿!What’s this? 喜:Oh!computer!(高兴地看笔记本)That’s a Laptop! 杨:Ha ha!Today I’m able to buy a computer!Next year,I will plan to buy a car! 喜:Really?Buys a car?Great! 杨:Ok,now we will go out ,are you ready 喜:Ha ha,I’m ready ok and waiting for you to come back!（门铃再次响起）Oh,I think there must be Aunt Wang and Dacun coming.(开门,) 王婶,大春,杨,喜(四人齐声贺道)Happy New Year!hah(喜儿和大春去一边嘻嘻哈哈,窃窃私语不知所言) 王婶:（走到杨白劳跟前）Mr Yang,I heard Dachun said,going to jump the disco dancing after dinner.Right? 杨:Right,What do you think? 王婶:I’m gald to,oh,are you prepared to go out? 杨:Sure!. 王婶:Ok,go?(问杨白劳) 杨:Let’s go,(朝喜儿他俩那边喊)Xi’er,Dachun,go! (四人出门 下) Part 2:In Huang Shiren’ home 黄:(黄世仁上台,气势汹汹地说)Hello,everyone!Do you know Huang Shiren?Tt’s me!Ha ha……But today is not yestady!You see Mu Renzhi coming! 穆:（穆仁智走上来）Mr Huang ,give me a litte,ok? 黄:Not!I wouldn’t give you,because I haven’t money!(不耐烦的样子) 穆:New Year coming,My wages,a year--?（哀求着） 黄:Really does not have! 穆:（拉着黄的手说）You are so kind in my eyes,can you give me litte money,ok? 黄:No way,what’s moreYang Bailao has not return the money to me,what can I do for you?(无奈的样子) 穆:You might ask for him! 黄:Asking him?I think he couldn’t give me! 穆:Why?He has contracted the farm,and made many money! 黄:I know!But,he—— 穆:(打断黄的话)Tries!Ok? 黄:(想了想)Ok!You go together with me! 穆:Let’s go!(两人出门 下) Part 3:In enlightens the hall 旁白:Yang Bailao,Xi’er,Dachun and Aunt Wang finished eating dinner and tojump the disco dancing.(迪斯科音乐起,四人在舞台上狂欢着) （一会儿,杨的电话响了,他走到前台接电话） 杨:This is Yang Bailao,please speaking!...oh...oh!-- 王婶:（王大婶看见,向杨走过来）Who’s that? 杨:Huang Shiren,he said he coming here immediately. 喜：(停止跳舞,朝这边问)Huang Shiren?Is all right?（杨白老点头示对） 大春:Nothing!We would take them away if they appeared! 杨,喜,D,W:Ha ha (四人继续跳舞) （黄世仁和穆仁智一前一后的东张西望地从下面走上台前） 黄:Oh!Everyone,Happy New Year! （大家看了看,没人理睬） 杨:（杨朝黄走了过去）The same to you!(音乐停,其他人也走了过来) 黄:(和杨握手)Recently alright? 杨:Fina,but if you ask the money that’s wrong!（自己先坐下,示意让黄世仁坐,这时大春用脚把凳子往后一勾了下,黄坐到地上了,尴尬的看看大家） 大春:Oh,I resemble see to have the dirty thing,but not,sits down! 黄:(朝杨白老问)Who is this?（穆仁智扶黄起来） 杨:He is Wang Dachun,Xi’er’s boyfriend. 黄:(打量大春说)Are you Xi’er’s boyfriend? 大春:Yes!(喊道)Is not my that is you? 黄:No,no!you!(胆怯的坐下) 杨:What’s the mater? 黄:I’m sorry,but,today is the last of the year!en—Debt is--- 杨:(打断黄的话) Does not have! 黄:I know you are good man,give a litte,ok?(乞求的样子) 杨:No matter what you said to,nothing! 黄（抱住杨白老的腿哀求到）Mr Yang ,a litte,just a litte…… 杨:No money,only a life have! 黄:just a litte…… 杨:(很无情地说) No money,only a life have! 黄:（无助地向四处环顾）En---- 大春:(不耐烦地说)You have not heard?Does not have! 黄:（朝喜儿望去）Miss,you help us!help us !ok?(哀求着) 王婶:（和喜儿站一块的王大婶说）What you want to do? 大春:Boils!Go out!（语气非常强烈） ( 杨白劳推开黄,喜儿,王大春,王大婶赶黄世仁和穆仁智走) 穆:（拉着杨白老的手求到）Do not expel me go,I want to leave,from now,I do for you ,I cound drive--- 杨:(排了排穆仁智)Ha ha,nice!ok!(穆仁智和所有的人都赶黄世仁出门) 黄:（冲穆仁智喊道)Mu Renzhi!Mu Renzhi!Do you know you is my housekeep? 穆:No!Go out!(全部下)