现代英文话剧

在一个阳光明媚的清晨，灰太狼在摩尔城堡抓青蛙回去给老婆吃。Pleasant goat and grey wolf " " mole drama script in a sunny morning, grey wolf in the castle to catch the frog back to eat his wife.灰太狼：青蛙！青蛙！你别跑！我抓到你的！Grey Wolf: frog! Frog. Don't you run! I gotcha.灰太狼看见一群小羊在城堡露台上玩Grey wolf saw a group of sheep in the castle terrace to play灰太狼：嘿嘿，今晚要改菜单了......Grey Wolf: Hey, tonight will change the menu ... ..在狼堡.....The Wolf fort ....红太狼：青蛙呢？Wolf: the frog?灰太狼：老婆，我看到小羊了，这次我一定抓到小羊Grey Wolf: wife, I saw a lamb, this time I must catch the lamb红太狼：嗯，我就再信你一次这次一定要抓羊Red: Well, I'll trust you again this time to catch the sheep灰太狼：老婆，我发明了溜溜鞋走路比常人快一倍！Grey Wolf: wife, I invented yo-yo shoes to walk faster than average one times!红太狼：抓不到羊就别回来Red Wolf: catch the sheep do not come back在羊村......In the sheep village ... ..喜羊羊：今天天气真好，大家快来玩吧！Pleasant goat: the weather is nice today, we quickly come to play!美羊羊、懒羊羊、费羊羊：好呀！The beautiful sheep sheep, sheep, for sheep: ah!喜羊羊：玩什么呢？Pleasant goat: play what?美羊羊：抓迷藏吧The beautiful sheep sheep: hide and seek懒羊羊：睡觉、吃零食A lazy sheep sheep: sleep, eat snacks沸羊羊：我无所谓....Sturdy sheep: I don't care ....喜羊羊：玩抓迷藏吧Pleasant goat: a game of hide and seek.懒羊羊：我找个地方睡觉去A lazy sheep sheep: I find a place to sleep灰太狼：亲爱的小肥羊本大王来啦Grey Wolf: dear little sheep and the king.懒羊羊：ZzzzzzLazy: Zzzzzzzz灰太狼：小肥羊们你们好！Grey Wolf: little sheep are you good!喜羊羊：灰太狼来了快逃！！！Grey Wolf: pleasant goat to flee!!!美羊羊：救命！The beautiful sheep sheep : help!灰太狼：抓住美羊羊啦Grey Wolf: catch the beautiful sheep sheep沸羊羊：美羊羊我来救你！Sturdy sheep: pretty I came to help you!灰太狼：不自量力Grey Wolf: too big for her skin沸羊羊：救命喜羊羊Pleasant goat goat : help灰太狼：跟我回家吧Grey Wolf: come home with me.在狼堡........The Wolf fort ....灰太狼：老婆羊来了Grey Wolf: wife of sheep.红太狼：快烧水煮羊Red Wolf: fast firing boiled sheep沸羊羊：救命~Sturdy sheep: help ~喜羊羊：沸羊羊！美羊羊！Pleasant goat：Sturdy sheep！The beautiful sheep sheep美羊羊：喜羊羊救我The beautiful sheep sheep: Pleasant Goat and save me喜羊羊：恩，我来解开绳子Pleasant goat: Well, I come to untie the rope喜羊羊像狼堡扔了个炸弹就和美羊羊和沸羊羊走了Pleasant goat like the Wolf fort threw a bomb on the beautiful sheep sheep and goat go灰太狼、红太狼：我们一定会回来的！！！

Little Red Riding Hood第一场：Little Red Riding Hood家Mum：(妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里）Little Red Riding Hood:(唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy, what are you doing?Mum： （一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill.Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma.Little Red Riding Hood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok!Mum： （亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说） Be good. Be careful.Little Red Riding Hood： Yes ,mummy．Goodbye, mummy.Mum： Bye-bye. Darling.第二场：在路上(一阵轻快的音乐由远而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁)Little Red Riding Hood： Wow！Flowers, how beautiful! （放下篮子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three flowers.Wolf：（随着一阵低沉的音乐，Wolf大步地走上台）I am wolf. I am hungry. (做找东西状,东张西望) Here is a little red riding hood. Hi! Little Red Riding Hood. Where are you going? (做狡猾的样子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼)Little Red Riding Hood：(手摸辫子，天真地回答)To Grandma’s．Grandma is ill.Wolf：（自言自语）I' ll eat Grandma. But……（对Little Red Riding Hood说）Hey, look! 6 little baby ducks.Little Red Riding Hood：(和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞)Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后）Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello! Baby ducks，how are you?Six Ducks：We’ re fine．Thank you． Where are you going?Little Red Riding Hood：To Grandma’s．Oh, I must go, bye.Six Ducks：Goodbye．第三场：Grandma家Grandma：（喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。）Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）I am very hungry now. (做找寻的样子)Where is Grandma’ s house? (高兴地对观众说)Aha , it’s here.(敲门)Bang, Bang, Bang．Grandma：Who is it？Wolf：（装出Little Red Riding Hood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It’s me. Little Red Riding Hood.Grandma：(边说边起床) Come in, come in.Wolf：(得意洋洋地走到床边) Grandma , I’ll eat you.Grandma： （惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上）灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy！I’ll sleep.Little Red Riding Hood：(高兴地敲门)Grandma．Grandma．Wolf：(装扮成Grandma的声音) Who is it？Little Red Riding Hood：It’s me。Little Red Riding Hood. What a strange noise!Wolf：Come in， Come in.Little Red Riding Hood：(蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌子上，走到床前一看，跳回几步)Oh! What are big ears!Wolf：I can listen to your sweet voice.Little Red Riding Hood：Wow! What a big eyes!Wolf：I can see you pretty face.Little Red Riding Hood：Oh! What a big hand.Wolf：I can hug you.Little Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look! What a big hands?Wolf：(从床上跳起来说)I can eat you!Little Red Riding Hood：(拼命地跑)Oh！No! No!Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It’s delicious. I still sleep. I like sleeping.Hunter：(一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场)Where’s the wolf? Look! A door．(推门)The wolf is sleeping.Wolf：(发出呼呼的响声)Hunter：(端起枪想打，又放下)What a big stomach! (摸摸Wolf的肚子)Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside .I must be hurry．(从桌子上拿起剪刀，举起) Look! Scissors. (做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut, cut, cut.Little Red Riding Hood/Grandma：Thank you．Hunter：Grandma ,give me some needles and thread．Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones．Grandma：(从桌子上拿来针线)Little Red Riding Hood：(搬来几个石头)One, two, three.Hunter：(把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里)Grandma：I'll thread it.Hunter：(拿起枪)Woke up!Wolf：(起床，两手托着大肚子)My stomach is so heavy.Hunter：You big bad wolf, raise your arms!Wolf：(边跑边说) Help! Don’t shot me!Hunter： （开枪）Bang, bang!Wolf： (应声倒下)Hunter：The bad wolf is dead．Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma：Yeah! Thank you．Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）: Thank you

逃课Scene I(Anita, Kevin, Ken, Jason, Steven, and Rita are all Tunghai University students. They are good friends. One day, Ken and Jason meet on the way to the classroom.)Ken: Why are you late? And, you just missed the last class. The teacher gave us the main topics for the mid-term examination.Jason: Oh, shoot! I just missed it. Would you lend me your notes so I can make a copy?Ken: Sure if you give me a good reason why you missed the class. You promised me that you would be in class on time today.Jason: Believe me, I would like to keep my word. The problem is that I have the “Business Management” test today and I was up studying for it till three o’clock this morning. Then I fell asleep and woke up at ten o’clock this morning.Ken: You studied until three o’clock this morning? Why? What did you do yesterday afternoon? I know you were free from four o’clock on yesterday.Jason: Well, I met one of my very old friends on line and we just talked too long…Ken: For God’s sake! Don’t you care about next week’s mid-term examination?——————————————————————————–Scene II(Anita, Steven and Kevin are talking to one another in front of a classroom. And, Anita is trying to prevent Steven and Kevin from cutting the next class.)Anita: Hey, we’ll have the “Business Management” class in a few minutes. Where are you going? Don’t tell me that you are going to argue with Jason.Steven: I will do anything for my good friend. Of course I am going to argue with the guy who gave my good friend a hard time.Anita: You always like to get involved in someone else’s business. You’ll get yourself in trouble. Don’t you know it? …Kevin: Anita, don’t be upset with him. He will not listen to you. Just leave him alone. By the way, I am still waiting for your decision. Are you coming with me to the concert tomorrow?Anita: Oh, I am sorry that I almost forgot it. What time tomorrow?Kevin: Two o’clock. I cannot wait to see my adorable superstar – Jolin. Oh, how wonderful!Anita: wait a minute. We have Calculus class tomorrow afternoon. Are you out of your mind?Kevin: Well, I’m not. Yet I think we can just copy the notes from someone else.Anita: No, this is a very important class. And you would never understand it without listening to the lecture.Kevin: To me it makes no difference. Even if I were in the class I would never understand what the teacher is talking about. Besides, who likes to look at the old baldhead?——————————————————————————–Scene III(After Calculus class, Anita is on the way to the ST building. At the same time, Rita is walking to the ST building from the dorm. They meet in front of the laboratory.)Rita: Here I am. Look, I did what I promised. I am a good girl, not skipping classes.Anita: What are you talking about? This is the 5th class. You skipped the first four classes this morning. Yesterday you promised that you would not skip any class.Rita: Did I? We don’t have any class in the morning but we’re packed in the afternoon on Wednesdays.Anita: I beg your pardon? Today is Thursday and we have classes the whole day. Besides, didn’t you meet us this morning while we were going out to class?Rita: I thought you were going to the library.Anita: You are loopy now because you’ve skipped too, too many classes.Rita: Why did you say so? I know that we will have the Computer Program test tomorrow.Anita: You are incurable. The test was this morning!——————————————————————————–Scene IV(Ken and Rita are talking to each other. They are talking about how to skip a class. )Ken: I wonder why your Calculus professor never takes attendance. Yet, every time I skipped class, my professor always knew I was absent. I think I am really unlucky.Rita: well, you’ll appreciate what I’m going to tell you now, my three very good suggestions.Ken: What are they?Rita: Now lend me your ears – First of all, whether you skip the class or not, you’ll never pass the course.Ken: How do you know that I will not pass?Rita: Calculus is extremely difficult. I don’t believe you can pass it.Ken: Maybe you are right. What else?Rita: Before you skip the class you should treat everyone nicely. And after that, you should try to flatter your professor.Ken: Why?Rita: Well if you treat the classmates nicely, they will help you sign your name on the attendance sheet. And if you flatter your professor properly, you may ask the professor to pass you. Lastly – To skip the classes successfully you cannot skip too many classes or too few.Ken: What do you mean? Not too many and not too few?Rita: You need good weather for skipping classes so you can go out to fool around. And then you need good timing so you can go to the newly opened internet café that is on discount. Finally you need good relationships with the classmates so they can cover it up for you.Ken: You are a genius.Rita: I am just very professional.Ken:   I see now. I will try sometimes. Hah, Hah, Hah!!!——————————————————————————–Scene V(Ken meets Kevin at the parking lot.)Kevin: It’s time for the English class. Why are you here?Ken: I don’t want to go to English class. I want to cut the class.Kevin: Why?Ken: Because someone told me cutting classes can be fun.Kevin: That’s right. I will show you how much fun it is to cut classes.Ken: Ok. Let’s go.(Kevin and Ken cut the class and go out to have fun with girls. And both of them will fail the English class. Therefore next semester they will see Jean, their English teacher, again.)——————————————————————————–Tags: 6人剧本, 大学生活, 趣味剧本

图兰朵 、美女与野兽、哈姆雷特

勇敢的小红帽Mum： (妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里）Little Red Riding Hood：(拿着双节棍，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy, what are you doing?Mum： （一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma.L：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok!M：（亲切地看着L）Be careful.and……if you are ever in trouble,don’t fight,just run , just run away.L： Yes ,mummy．Goodbye, mummy.Mum： Bye-bye. Darling.(M下, L挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁)L： Wow！Flowers, how beautiful! （放下篮子摩拳擦掌地采花）I’ll pick some flowers！Wolf：（Wolf大步地走上台）I am gray wolf. I am so hungry. (东张西望) Here is a little red riding hood!Rad wolf： I am rad wolf.（指着W）he is my huaband,a foolish wolf.（叉腰出现在身后）have you got any food?W：（一惊，转身，谄媚地弯腰笑着）darling,i……R：I don’t need any explanation! I don’t want to eat vegetables any more!You must get some meat now! now!W：（抱头）yes darling!i will!（来到舞台中央，对L）Hi! Lovely girl!Where are you going? (狡猾的和L打招呼)L：who……oh!(警觉的退后）you are that bad grey wolf!aren’t you?W(吃惊)：how do you know?L：Because you looks so ugly and your prologs are very old. My mum has told me many stories about wolves.you are silly and bad……you can’t trick me!W：（晕倒状，扶额无语）e…….L：(上下指指点点)：look at your dirty clothes and messy hair,no no no……how shameless!W：（低头看自己，一脸委屈）I don’t have money to buy new shoes or clothes or mirror……（转头看一眼R）all my monry have given my wife……R：（声音从后边传来）what did you say?——say again!W：nothing! Darling! i said nothing I sware!R：you’d bett be quick!i’m hungry!W：ok ok!（看着L，舔嘴角，恶狠狠）now,I can eat you!L：（摆出拳击手势，对W勾勾手指）you may try if you want to die ! i will let you know the meaning of ‘regret’ !W：（退后两步，犹豫）why?shi isn’t like that fool Little Red Riding Hood in story that my grandpa told me……what should I do?R：(上台，对W)where is my food?W：（指L）here shi is.R：why don’t you catch her?W：（结结巴巴）d d d darling,i……（哼哼唧唧）L：（突然想起，一拍脑袋）oh!my mum told me not to fight,I must run away immediately.（俯身偷偷看了一眼W，蹑手蹑脚地慢慢走开）R：（生气，揪住W耳朵大吼）stupid ！you are a wolf and she is only a little girl !W：（反应过来）yes! I am a strong wolf !（看到L要逃，指着她大喊）hey ! stop !(追上去)（R 挥舞平底锅加油，W追L，两人在台上跑）R：come on ! come on ! good ! catch her !（最终W捉住L）W：（得意洋洋）Aha! I catch you!（对R）darling,we will have meat to eat this evening!R：yes ! I can’t wait to have dinner! Dear, let’go home now!M：（从后台走上）Little Red Riding Hood?my dear? Where are you?L：（大喊）mum mum! I am here !M：（看见，吃了一惊）：grey wolf?oh no! let my daughter go !W：（哈哈大笑）you are day dreaming!i am a wolf !A evil wolf! I must eat her as my dinner!M：（沉重地）yes I know,you are a wolf.but listen,Mr.wolf,you’d better let her go,or you will have bad luck,you may be hurt……it’s my advise.（L从篮子里抽出双节棍，追着W一阵痛打，W抱头痛的满台跑）R：（追上W）dear! What happened ! are you ok?……dear!……（L,M,R跑下台）M：（惋惜、同情地）Mr.wolf,you see,I have told you but you didn’t follow my words……（后台W的声音遥遥传来：we will go back again!）（L蹦蹦跳跳上台）L：dear mum,the grey wolf has gone away!M：god to be thanked!L：not god helps me,I can save myself ! mum ,I am clever and strong!M：you are right , my dear!you did a good job!（《健康歌》，L和M来到中央跳舞）L：we should do exercise everyday and be stronger,at that time ,no wolf can hurt us!mum ,let’s go to see my grandma!（W,R搀扶着上台，L看见了，W,R急忙要走）L：hey! Stop!(追下台)M：dear!dear! where you go ?……drea!(亦下台)

[话剧剧本]《幸福，到六为止？》剧组名单（共19 人） 杭高话剧… 12-18 [话剧剧本]流浪日记 (又名:《依靠的归宿》) 杭高话剧… 12-18 [话剧剧本]提拉米苏的眼泪 杭高话剧… 12-18 [话剧剧本]战国无双——信长之野望 杭高话剧… 12-18 [话剧剧本][剧本]九八版《窒息》 佚名 12-07 [话剧剧本]天堂地狱大比拼（搞笑） 佚名 12-07 [话剧剧本]《我爱抬杠》 刘深 12-07 [话剧剧本]空城记 黄佑华 12-07 [话剧剧本]经典剧本《去年冬天》 编 剧 喻… 12-07 [话剧剧本]天堂隔壁是疯人院 编 剧 喻… 12-07 [话剧剧本]媒体爱滋病 韩继光 12-07 [话剧剧本]《那边》 子 抗 12-07 [话剧剧本]北京人 曹禺 12-07 [话剧剧本]堕落天使 佚名 12-07 [话剧剧本]《齐介一》 赖晓旭 12-07 [话剧剧本]《史步可》 赖晓旭 12-07 [话剧剧本]《我这一辈子》 丑子 12-07 [话剧剧本]午夜（剧本） 格子格兮 12-07 [话剧剧本]灰姑娘（男生版）——剧本 佚名 12-07 [话剧剧本][剧本]常规与例外 贝托尔特… 12-07

守株待兔（英语短剧） 剧本你可以自己调节角色~[开始。树）上台安静地屹立到舞台较后方。导演（范冰）走到台前]导演：Action！[跑下台][农夫冷酷地上。]农夫：I’m a farmer.（稍停顿）[走两步]A modern farmer.（掏出墨镜戴上）[冷酷地走两步，突然被绊了一跤，回头生气地踢了下绊自己的石头，继续保持冷酷]When I was yong,I studied in Nan~tong Middle School[掏出胸卡骄傲地展示给观众看，收起]！So I’m rich now！[开始展示名牌，边说边掏]Look！This is my modern mobile——Motorola WC 250！This is my Swatch!This my MP3!This is my shoes——ADI~DAS!This is… [不经意地掏出一个苹果]Oh,sorry. And look at this![从怀里掏出痒痒挠] Do U know what’s this？痒痒挠？No no no~~It’s my modern——锄头~！！[看下表]It’s time to do some farming！[开始弯下腰做出锄地的动作，锄了两下，突然] Oh yes!I think farming should be combined with music![掏出MP3戴上，开始很有激情地边锄地边唱]Farming farming,I’m farming!Farming should be combined with music~!Farming farming,I’m farming!Farming will be funny and easy~![边唱边锄边慢慢下台，把没用的道具拿走，把有用的道具准备在口袋里] [树走上前台]树：I’m a tree!I can do many things!I can sing![做出疯狂摇滚歌手的动作，边做边唱：哼哼哈西！！！]I can dance![跳四小天鹅]I’m tall!And I’m Strong!IF you hit me,you will 挂掉！Oh?There comes a rabbit! [引导观众看兔子A)。树站回后台][兔子A上]兔子A（一开始不知道状况。以为自己扮演周杰伦，所以很热情地上场跟观众打招呼）：Hey everybody,I’m Jay!I love U!I love Nantong![展示新专辑《十一月的肖邦》]Now let me sing one of my new songs to U！The name of the song is 《发如雪》！[清清嗓子正要唱，这时候导演（范冰）上]导演：[拿手中纸筒狠狠打了下兔子A的头]What are U doing?! Now U are a rabbit,understand?![兔子A：Sorry sorry sorry] [导演边说边夺过《十一月的肖邦》。导演下台之前，看了下《十》] What’s this?[看了看，惊喜地]Oh!It’s mine！（很兴奋地拿着下场）兔子A：OK,now I’m a rabbit. I just had my breakfast. Now I’m just walking around here. I think walking after meals is good for my health. [在场上转圈，悠闲散步][农夫继续锄地，边锄边上场，突然看见前面有个兔子]农夫：（惊喜地）Lunch！[扔掉痒痒挠]I will catch it！ [偷偷摸摸地跟到兔子后面走][农夫跟在兔子后面。两个人走啊走。兔子突然回头。农夫假装看手表。两人继续走。兔子回头。农夫假装看天气。两人继续走。兔子回头。农夫假装打手机。两人继续走，兔子回头。这次农夫冷酷地把枪口对准了兔子。]兔子A：Wahhhh~!（吓一跳）What’s this！农夫：Hnnnn…！I will kill U for lunch!兔子A：But your gun… [帮农夫把枪头调转过来（农夫一开始把枪对着自己）]农夫：Thank you!兔子A：My pleasure. （突然想起来农夫要杀自己） Wah~~~~~~ [兔子跑，躲到树后面，农夫追到树前]农夫：Where~ to go? Haha![农夫开了一枪“砰”。兔子在树后惊慌躲闪，没被打到。树做出受伤中弹状。 农夫又开枪，同上。 农夫开始加快频率，火力密集地开枪。兔子开始时惊慌躲闪，躲着躲着跳起舞来。树继续痛苦中弹状。]兔子A[自我陶醉中，边跳边说]You didn’t hurt me! You didn’t hurt me！树：[痛苦万分地]But…U…Hurt me….[痛苦地慢慢挪动到兔子背后][兔子继续兴奋地跳舞。农夫停止开枪，走到兔子面前，看着它。 兔子猛然抬头发现]农夫：Ah ha~! Bye bye ! [举枪对准兔子，开枪，没声音，看看枪，示意没子弹了。兔子见状，非常兴奋地大笑起来]兔子A：Ha ha ha ha! You can’t kill me now！ [兴奋大笑，笑到抽筋，笑到后仰。突然头撞倒了后面的树] Wa ！[兔子晕两下~~ “我倒！” 倒地]农夫：OH! [很兴奋地过去两个手指提起兔子]My lunch , I caught you !!! [想一下] But I’m still full now.Let me tie it to the tree and have a sleep.I will eat it after sleeping.[把兔子绑到树上。倒地睡到树旁边]……兔子A：[兔子很快醒了，看看四周，发现自己被绑了，很惊讶]Where am I? What happened?树：[指着农夫]He caught you and wanted to eat you.兔子A：What?! I must leave here! But how can I escape？[东张西望，看到农夫的手机][兔子不知不觉地把树杈移开，走到手机前看了看]咦？What’s this？[捡起来看]Oh,a mobile.[再看]It’s beautiful.[放回原处。 又自觉地把自己绑在树上。 突然想起来]A mobile！Maybe I can call some one to help me！ [又不知不觉地把自己放出来，那起手机] But how to use it？？？树：[走上前]Let me tell U.Look,press this button![给兔子]兔子A：Oh I see. [做出打电话的样子] 喂？李咏：[上台，激情澎湃地] Hello！This is lucky fifty-two！[做出幸运52的手势]I’m Liyong！Now let’s start our first question！What’s the most probable relation between 康熙 and 雍正？ A. Husband and wife B.Teacher and student C.Waiter and costomer Answer me,please!兔子A：（很冷漠地）Sorry， wrong number.[挂掉]李咏：Answer me!Answer me! En..?喂？喂喂？[很郁闷地下台]兔子A：Now let me call again.[拨打] 喂？兔子B：喂？兔子A：Hey Jackey！兔子B：Hey tommy!兔子A：How are you doing?兔子B：Fine,thank you.And U?兔子A：I’m fine too!How are your parents doing?兔子B：They are fine,thank you.And U?兔子A：They are fine,too!How is your uncle doing?兔子B：He’s fine,thank you!And U?兔子A：He’s fine , too!兔子B：But why do you call me? If you want borrow some money from me…NO WAY!!!兔子A：No no no!I’m in danger now!Come and help me!!!兔子B：But where are you?兔子A：I’m under a tree!兔子B：[边打电话边在附近走，经过兔子A面前，两个人还没发现]What can you see around you?兔子A：I see a rabbit ,rather like you!兔子B：A rabbit…rather like me… OK! I’ll soon come!Wait for me! I will help you! [匆匆离开][兔子A 打完电话，小心翼翼地把手机放回农夫处，还很有礼貌地说了句“Thank you.” 然后又很自觉地把自己绑回了树上]兔子A：Hahaha!My friend will come and save me,yeah! [兴奋过度，后仰，头又撞倒树上，昏眩中…“我晕！” 又晕了][兔子B上。]兔子B：I’m also rabbit！I’m clever! I’m brave ! And I’m strong! [展示肌肉] OH！My friend is here!Let me help him out! [费力地想把树枝（双臂）挪开，使了几次劲，还是不行] It’s too tight! I must think of a good way! [看到农夫扔掉的痒痒挠] Let’s see,what’s this！A 锄头！[装作打高尔夫球，试了试锄头手感]Oh,it’s nice.[走到树面前，正要砍]树：Stop！！！What will you do?兔子B：I will cut you down to save my friend.树：O. [突然醒悟] What?! Cut me down?! Teachers told us that we should protect the environment! Understand?!兔子B：Oh yes！You are right! [扔掉锄头] I have to think of another idea! [想了想] Oh!![灵感突来][看了看手表] Oh it’s time to do morning exercise ！Come on! [开始带头做早操。做着做着对树说“Follow me！” （企图让树动起来，两只手松开，这样就可以救出兔子A）树也开始跟着做起早操。 兔子B轻轻上前，想救出兔子A。但是树的广播操动作恰好都是会挡住营救的。兔子B狂汗… -_-b 广播操毕。树继续绑着兔子A]兔子B：Why?! Maybe I need another idea. Oh!I’v got it！Music！ [音响放起泰坦尼克号主题曲高潮前奏。 兔子B抱住树，企图引导树像女主角一样张开双臂，放出兔子A。树渐渐陶醉，手缓缓松开。兔子B正要搭救同伴，突然兔子A两只手张开，成了女主角动作。树又抱住了兔子A的腰，成了男主角动作。树和A陶醉其中。B要唤醒A：“Wake up!Wake up!”兔子A沉醉其中，完全不理它，还用脚踹走要救它的B：“Don’t disturb me！”继续陶醉。]兔子B：（无奈ing…）Stop！！！（音乐停） （沮丧）I can’t save my friend…[掏出纸巾想要擦汗，带出10块钱，掉在地上]树：Money！[一个箭步冲上去捡起钱，回到原位并且对着太阳验钞。]兔子A：[看四周] I’m free!!!Oh yes,I’m free!Thank you,Jackey! [慢动作深情扑向兔子B] Jackey~~~~ [突然兔子B低头系鞋带。兔子A控制不住一下子撞在树上，晕两下说：“暴头！”死翘。] [兔子B见状冲上去，深情地搂住A：“Tommy!Tommy！”[伤心地俯下身子，紧紧抱住A][这时睡觉中的农夫突然一个翻身，又把B压在了下面]兔子B：I…can’t….breath……I’m dying!!!! [也翘了]农夫：[农夫这时候醒了。擦了下口水，看见两只兔子] En..?Two rubbits! I rememer I have caught just one?! Oh,maybe I drank too much.[兴奋地一手提一只兔子，哼着小曲下场]树：[还在验钞的树正在高兴，突然发现是假钞]A！It’s a fake！Wait for me！[追下去]

英语四人话剧!幽默搞笑的话剧剧本《赖皮孙子糊涂爷爷》

演员: P: Pirate-Grandson. M: Mother.

F: Father. K: King -Grandpa.

旁白: There are 4 members in a family, Pirate, a 7-year-old naughty boy. His mummy is a beautiful white-collar worker. His dad, Andy Lau is a famous singer, and his dear grandpa, King is a kindly old man. Pirate loves his grandpa most, because King is very spoiling him. He hates his parents. Frankly speaking, he is afraid of them, Because they are very strict with him. .

正剧：(P,K出场)

P: Old King, Open the TV, I want to see Tom and Jerry. I love that mouse. Quick! No time! I can’t wait another second.

K: Oh dear! I nearly forget it. Don’t worry, I open it right now. (作开电视状)

P: Ha Ha! It’s really funny! Tom is so good! (作高兴状)搞笑小品

Oh no! “The End!” Where is Tom? I hate the end! (摔电视机，liuxue86.com作极度气愤状) Old King!? (对K吼)

K：Oh, what a pity dog! (作左顾右盼状) Your parents are not here ,and we can change another one ,our brave Pirate, just tell me. I’m sure your demand will be satisfied. (作充满自信状)

P：Really! OK! Now, let’s watch Caribbean Pirates!

K: Humm, No, it’s unfit for you…… (作犹豫状)

P: I just like this film, Old King, you tell lies. You don’t keep your promise.(作气愤欲泣状)

K; Oh yes, I play it for you. (作为难状) But please be quite, I’m afraid your parents wound not like us doing these.

P: Don’t tell so much! I have been an adult man of 7 years old. I promise it to you. (作自豪自信状)

K：OK. (作舒心，安慰状)

P: Fight him, kill him. Throw these bad guys into the sea…… (高声喊)

K: Xu …….. (作禁声状). Remember your promise, young adult man.

P: Oh? What promise? I have forgotten it. (作天经地义状)

K: Oh?! You are right(作理解状，因为Pirate一贯如此，出尔反尔)

P: Old King. I give you an honorable mission. (作自豪状) Be my horse, and I will ride on your back , let’s help these people in dangerous situation, just like a brave knight.(作勇敢状)

K: What! Ride on my back! Be your horse!!(作惊异状)

P: Yes, your hearing is very good, any question? (作若无其事状)

K: No, No, sound a good idea! Very good! You are a brave Pirate. Now come on my back. (作无奈状)

P: (作高兴状，作跃上马背状) Hei! Let’s go! Kill all those bad men. Quick! Run quick! ....... (意气风发状)

(M,F携手进场):搞笑小品剧本

P: Oh, my god! Mummy, Daddy! (A,D作慌忙状，挡在电视机前)

M: Dad, what are you doing!? Naughty Pirate, isn’t your trick!? (作气愤状)

P:(作阳痿状) Mummy, it’s not my fault. Old king let me massage his back. Hei Hei (作心虚状，以掩饰内心的恐惧)

M: I don’t believe it. (作严肃状) Dad, isn’t really that? (询问K)

K: Yes, of course, I can’t image a child only 5 year old, can massage so good. Oh……. (释然状，因为圆了我的谎)

M: Really. I don’t believe the litter pirate can massage, who taught him. (作怀疑状) Dear, isn’t you ?

F: No, I haven’t, but I decide to enjoy his massage another day, Do you think so, dear?

M: Yes, really a good suggestion.

(P，D作惊恐状。A：发抖，D：挥汗)

(P挡着电视怕被M、F发现，K也为P作掩饰)

P: Mummy, Do you feel a little cold?

K: Yes, I can feel it. (边挥汗边说冷)

M: No, it’s summer. Really hot, do you catch cold?

P: No, No, just my feeling. (更加发抖，一不小心被B看到了电视)

M: Pirate, what’s behind you? (疑问状)

P: Oh, nothing, nothing! (作惊恐状)

M: Move away .little Pirate! (作气愤状)

P: Oh no! The storm will come. (捂脸作害怕状)

M: Caribbean Pirate! What’s a bad film! Little Pirate!? (气愤状)

P: Mummy, I surrender. (作投降状)

M: Daddy ,this film is unfit for him , it is full of killing，force and negative passion, and it will let him become bad !

K: I know that, but I meat to let him watch Tom and Jerry and he like it very much. Yes? Pirate? (想转移话题与Pirate站在同一战线)

P: Yes, a very clever mouse and a stupid cat. (作博学状)

M: Dad, don’t let him watch so much TV, it wastes a lot of time, and it is bad for his eyesight. He may become short-sighted. (诚恳状)

小品：“不差钱”

(2009年中央电视台春节联欢晚会节目)

Got the Money Anyway(舞台上是一个餐厅的背景，写着：“苏格兰情调”。本山大叔穿着中山装，身上背着一串蒜头，手上拿着野鸡，拉着毛毛上场。)

(This short play is set in a restaurant named "Scottish Taste / Feel." Uncle Zhao, in his customary Chinese tunic suit, enters, carrying a string of garlic on his back and a pheasant in hand, with his granddaughter Yadar in tow.)

Uncle Zhao Here we are. 赵本山：到了。

Yadar Here we are. 毛毛： 到了。

Uncle Zhao It's the most expensive restrant in Tieling:苏格兰 调情~~~

赵本山：这就是铁岭最贵的一家饭店。这不，苏格兰调情(tiáo qíng)。 Yadar You got it wrong –苏格兰情调!!

毛毛： 爷爷，你念反了，苏格兰情调(qíng diào)。

Uncle Zhao 情调(qíng diào) All right, . We're gonna have our meal here anyway. 赵本山：啊，情调?就搁这儿吃。

Yadar But it's very expensive. 毛毛： 爷爷，这家老贵的啦。 Uncle Zhao So what? We've got the money, 30,000 yuan. Where's the bag? 赵本山：贵?咱带钱了，带三万多块，那包呢?

Yadar What bag? 毛毛： 我没拿包啊。

Uncle Zhao The yellow one with the money in it.

赵本山：装钱那包，黄包。

Yadar Oh no, I left it on the brick bed. 毛毛： 完了，让我落炕上了。

Uncle Zhao oh,what can I do? I do all this just for you ,how could you forget it! Any money left on you?

赵本山：我说，你这孩子还能办点事吗?!这给你办事，落炕上了还。兜里还有钱吗?

Yadar Let me see... (Fumbling) only 70-plus yuan.

毛毛： 兜里，多少钱哪才?才70多块钱。

Uncle Zhao Here's 400 more.

赵本山：我还有400。行，够了。

Yadar Still not enough. 毛毛： 这也不能够啊。

Uncle Zhao It’s ok. Waiter!

赵本山：哎呀，够不够就这样了。服务员!