四人英语小品

第一个：qjklw120穷酸秀才Little Duck: Hello, this is Little Duck speaking. Who’s that? Oh, dear Grandma. Yes, I’m fine. I miss you very much. I’ll come to visit you this morning. Good bye. Little Duck:: Wow! What a sunny day! I’m going to visit my grandma. （猫先生正在河边捉鱼。但是他总是抓不到。） Little Duck: Good morning, Mr. Cat. How are you? Mr. Cat: Fine. Thank you, and you? Little Duck: I’m fine, too. What are you doing? Mr. Cat: I’m catching fish! Look! It’s a big fish! But I can’t catch it! Little Duck: Don’t worry. Let me help you. （小鸭子跳入河里，帮猫先生捉到了鱼。） Little Duck: Here you are. Have a good meal. Mr. Cat: Thank you. It’s so kind of you. Little Duck: My pleasure.（抬头看看天色）I have to go now. Mr. Goat: Help! Help! Little Duck: Who’s crying? Mr. Cat: I don’t know. Little Duck: Let’s go and see. Mr. Cat: Alright. （小鸭子和猫先生一起四处寻找。） Mr. Cat: Here! It’s Mr. Goat! Little Duck: What’s wrong with you, Mr. Goat? Mr. Goat: I was running with singing. But I ran too fast and fell down. My leg is broken. I can’t stand up. Little Duck: Don’t worry. Let me help you. Mr. Cat, can you do me a favor? Mr. Cat: Sure. （他们把山羊先生扶起来。然后一起送山羊先生回了家。） Mr. Goat: Thank you very much. Little Duck: It’s alright. Oh, it’s too late. I have to go now. Mr. Cat and Mr. Goat: Where are you going? Little Duck: I’m going to visit my grandma. Mr. Cat and Mr. Goat: Thank you for helping us. Little Duck: It’s my pleasure. Mr. Cat and Mr. Goat: Have a good time! Little Duck: I will. Good bye! Mr. Cat and Mr. Goat: Good bye! 第二个：w.bush: doctor, what is wrong with my brain? doctor: your brain is perfectly ok. w.bush: how come? doctor: you are the same as everybody else, having right brain and life brain. w.bush: and? doctor: but yours is even far bether than all the others. w.bush: oh? doctor: yes, sir, everybody’s brain is not seperated so perfect. but yours is an exception. w.bush: tell me how could it be an exception, not because I am the head of USA. I hope. doctor: sir, your brain is really seperated completely, there is nothing right in your left brain, and there is nothing left in your right brain. A:Do,do,do,how do you do? See, see, see, nice to see you. ABCDEFG, I must 攻克you。Yeah.B:Hey, hey,hey.挺认真的呢！在干什么？英国老鼠,很时代感呀！A：哎，不学也不行了。往事不可提呀，太伤我们中华民族的自尊了。B：这么掺，说来听听。A：哎，有一次我在广州和daddy, mummy去广州乘bus.B：guangzhou bus, wow，many people.A：对了，人都快被挤成相片了。那bus go,stop,go, stop，我是东摇西晃前赴后继,啊，一不小心——B：撞死了。A：你咋就不能说一句好话啊！撞死了谁做你的搭档啊！踩到后面人的脚了。我回头一看，原来是一个身材魁梧，黄头发，蓝眼睛，白皮肤——B：你说老外得了呗！A：我一看是老外，咱可不能丢我们中华少年儿童的良好传统，于是我露出一个真诚的、迷人的微笑，说：I’m sorry!B:Oh,I’m sorry too!A:我这心一想：啊，人家老外sorry two,Oh,I’msorry three.B:What are you sorry for?A:哎呀！这老外是寸步不让啊，他都Sorryfour了，不行，我好歹也是学了五六年的英语了，我连忙说Oh,Oh,Oh,I’msorryfive!B:Sorryfive?HA!HA!HA!A:这老外还敢取笑我，气刹吾也！I’llgiveyousomecolourtoseesee!B：（模仿老外口音）什么？你要给我一点颜色看看！A：我一听，太他妈的伤自尊心了，于是一横心就打算把这破英语搞好。听说您最近英语学得很有心得，是不是真的呢？B：不敢，不敢，只不过是学得了一点儿皮毛，说不上一级棒！A：那这样子好了，让我来考考您！B：没问题，尽管考～ （一副很有自信的样子）A：注意听了：I am the apple of my parent's eye."是什麼意思？小鱼：apple,那还不容易吗？我们学校一年级的小朋友都会了，还考我：苹果啦。eye:就是眼睛。苹果眼睛，苹果怎么在眼睛呢？错了，肯定是句错句。那些老外的眼睛那么大的吗？往你父母的眼睛放苹果？B：No -No-No------- A：Oh, please.（哀求状）到底是什么了？B:嘿嘿，不懂了吧。你想想，我的爸爸妈妈最疼那个呀？A： 当然是你啦。B：对了，在他们的眼里，我是什么了？A： 小宝贝，小皇帝。B：汝子可教，汝子可教呀。那么: I am the apple of my parents' eye.就是说：A/B：我是我父母的小宝贝，我父母的掌上明珠。A：英国老鼠的知识实在太有趣了，我一定要好好地学习。B：对。让我们天天read，天天listen,天天进步！yeah. 怀古伤今团队为你解答

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龟兔赛跑(Hare and tortoise) Bird: Friends, friends, come here and have a look. （伙伴们，伙伴们，快来看啊！）The hare and the tortoise will have a match again. （小兔和乌龟又要比赛了。） Monkey: The hare and the tortoise will have a match? （小兔和乌龟又要比赛了？） Didn’t the hare lose last year? Why do that again? （小兔不是输了吗？怎么还要比呀？） Bird: Yes, the hare lost the match last year, and her mother was too angry to eat anything in two days. （是的，小兔去年输了，兔妈妈气得两天没吃任何东西。） Mother hare order them to have a match again this year. （兔妈妈命令他们今年再比一次。） Monkey: Oh, so it is. （原来是这样。） Together: ( Music)...! Monkey: Everybody, the match begins. （各就各位，比赛开始了。） I’m the referee. （我是裁判） Hare and tortoise, ready? （小兔乌龟，准备好了吗？） Mother hare: Honey! Honey! Come on! （亲爱的！亲爱的！快过来！） Have some coffee. （喝些咖啡。） Hare: Mom, oh, I can’t drink it all. （妈妈，哦，我喝不下了。） Mother hare: It can help you keep alert on the way. （它可以让你精精神神的。） My little dear! Drink it quickly! （亲爱的！快点喝了它！） Monkey: Mother hare, the match is going to begin. （兔妈妈，比赛要开始了。） Mother hare: Ah! The match is going to begin. （啊！比赛要开始了。） Monkey: Please ready, go! （预备，跑！） Birds: Come on, come on! （加油，加油！） Tortoise will be the winner. （乌龟赢！） Tortoise will be the winner. （乌龟赢！） Hare: Yi? I know this tree, oh, yes! The grass is very soft. （我认识这棵树，是的，草软软的。） I fell asleep comfortable under the big tree. （树下睡觉舒舒服服的。） This time I won’t sleep. （这次我不会再睡了。） Oh? There are two routes. Here or there? Which one? （这里有两条路，这儿？那儿 ？哪条啊？） Mom, mom, help me, help me! （妈妈，妈妈，帮帮我，帮帮我。） Tortoise: Hare, let me tell you, turn to the right. （小兔，我告诉你，向右。） Hare: Ah! Tortoise, you’re here? So fast! （啊！乌龟，你跑到这儿了？这么快！） Come on, come on! （我得加油了！） He’s my opponent, Can I believe him? choose the right way？No! （他是我的对手，我能相信他走右边吗？不！） After I run farther, he will turn to the left, （等我跑远了，他再往左一拐。） Then I will lose the match. （那我就要输了这场比赛。） Oh, yes, I should choose the left way. Run faster! （哦，是的，我应该选走边，快跑！） Tortoise: Hare, hare, you’ve gone a wrong way. (小兔，小兔，你跑错路了。) Come back, come back. （回来，回来。） My friends come and help me! （伙伴们，快过来，帮帮我！） Together: Tortoise, why don’t you run fast? （乌龟，你为什么不快跑？） Mother hare: Oh, tortoise, Is it your turn to sleep under the tree this time? （哦，乌龟，这次是不是轮到你在树下睡觉了？） Tortoise: Mother hare, look! Your daughter’s got a wrong way. （兔妈妈，看！你女儿跑错路了。） Mother hare: Oh, my god, why? Why is she going there? （哦，天啊，为什么？她为什么会去那儿？） Didn’t you tell her it’s a wrong way? （你没告诉她那条路是错的吗？） Tortoise: I told her, but she didn’t believe me. （我说了，但是她不相信我。） She said “mother told me the opponent is the enemy. I couldn’t believe you.” （她说“妈妈告诉我对手就是敌人。我不能相信你。”） Mother hare: Yes, I said that. （我是说过。） My daughter’s got a wrong way, she can’t win the match. You run please! （我女儿跑错路了，她不能得冠军了，你跑吧！） Tortoise: Mother hare, she’s got the wrong way, it’s unfair to her, I must find her. （兔妈妈，她跑错路了，这样对她不公平，所以我必须找到她。） Hare mother: Tortoise, you, you’re a good boy. （乌龟，你，你是个好孩子，） The match won’t go on. My daughter loses at the very beginning because of me. （比赛不用进行了，因为我的错误，我女儿在起跑线上已经输了。咳！） Tortoise: Mother hare, it’s not important to win or lose the match. （兔妈妈，谁是冠军不重要。） Let’s call her back，OK? （让我们把她喊回来吧！） Together: Yes, you are right. OK! （是的，你说的对。） Hare, hare, come back. Come back. （小兔，小兔，回来。回来)

Fang: （出场） My name is Fang Fang. I am a student of Sanya No.1 Middle School. Granny: 芳芳，芳芳。 Fang: Oh, my granny is calling me. Do you know my granny? Everyone in our neighborhood calls her "Modern Granny". She is learning English. She wants to learn English well. She wants to show foreigners the beautiful scenery of our city and tell them the interesting stories about the Li people. Granny: （奶奶上。练读旅游英语300句 ） How do you do(好赌有赌) ? How do you do(好赌有赌)? Nice to meet you（奶死吐米油）. Me， too. I can't speak Chinese（爱砍他死屁踩你死）. Can（砍） you（油）speak English(英国历史)? Yes, a little（啊里头）. What can I do for you（我砍爱读佛油）? 这不，中国 加入了WTO，2008年又要举办奥运会，人人都在学英语，我也要学English….. 芳芳，芳芳！ Fang: 来了，奶奶。 Granny: 我的乖孙女， 你再听奶奶读一遍，看看还有什么地方读得不好。（读旅游 英语300句）How do you do (好赌有赌)? How do you do（好赌有赌）? Nice to meet you（奶死吐米油）. Me，too. I can't speak Chinese.（爱砍他死屁踩你死）. Can you speak English(砍油死屁英国历史)? Yes（爷死）, a little（啊里头）.What can I do for you（我砍爱读佛油）? （她边读边摇头晃脑，很自豪的样子） Fang: 奶奶，什么“好赌有赌”，是“How do you do? ”。不是“英国历史”，是"English"。 是" Chinese"，不是“踩你死”。跟我读。How do you do?(奶奶跟读) 不行，How do you do?（奶奶跟读） 好，再读 一 遍，（奶奶读）好,很 好.I can't speak Chinese. Can you speak English?（奶奶跟读）再来，I can't speak Chinese.(奶奶跟读) 好的，再来。（奶奶读）Can you speak English?(奶奶跟读) 好，再练一下。 Granny: （练读两遍）好了，好了，不错了。（突然看见外宾路过）太好了！ 来了个老外！（站起，上前）Hello, (学外国人动作，伸开双手 ) How do you do? What can I do for you? Foreigner: How do you do? I want to go to the bank. Where is the nearest one? Granny : （急忙翻书）芳芳，他说的话在第几页？ Fang: 这本书上没有这句话。他想去银行。Bank----银行。（奶奶练习 bank ）(芳芳对外宾) Hello, welcome to Sanya. You are going to the bank, aren't you? Go along this street, when you reach the traffic lights, turn left. There is a bank about one hundred metres ahead, on the left, just opposite the bus station. Foreigner: Thank you very much. Your English is very good. Fang: Thank you. Granny: Hello, I 带 you go. Fang: Excuse me, shall my granny take you there? Foreigner: (对奶奶) Thank you. It's very kind of you. Granny: (摇摇头) No thank you. No thank you. (外宾显出不大理解的样子) How do you do? Foreigner: How do you do? Granny: Nice to meet you. Foreigner: Me too. Granny: 你们瞧，我会跟老外对话了。(看书 ) I can't speak Chinese. Can you speak English? Foreigner: (疑惑不解) Why, yes, of course. Granny: No. No. 错了，you错了，看，在这呢。（指书上） “Yes, a little. What can I do for you?”（外宾明白了怎么回事，笑） Foreigner: It's funny. (来到银行) （解放路，汽车站对面） Granny: Bank. Bank 到了。 Teller: Good morning. Welcome to our bank. Can I help you? Foreigner: Good morning. Can I change foreign money in your bank? Teller: Yes, you can. But what money would you like to change, please? Foreigner: Some U S D notes. Teller: How much, please? Foreigner: Two hundred dollars in all. Teller: Please show me your passport and fill out this exchange memo in duplicate. Foreigner: (填好 换水单) There, I've got them finished. And here is my passport. Granny: (指护照问) What's this? Foreigner: My passport. Granny: 买怕死婆（My passport）. 买怕死婆 （My passport）. Teller: Yes, everything is all right. Well, by the way, how would you like the money, Mr Smith? Foreigner: I don't mind. Any kinds of denominations are OK. Teller: Here you are, Mr. Smith. Your money comes to RMB￥1，654. Foreigner: Thank you very much. Teller: My pleasure. Foreigner：Your service is good and your English is excellent. Teller: I am very happy to hear you say so. Goodbye. And enjoy your stay in Sanya. Foreigner: Goodbye. Granny: Goodbye（骨德拜）. （走出银行） F: I want to go to some scenic spots. G: 什么“搏”？ F: Scenic spots.(拿出词典指奶奶看 ) scenic spots. G: 哦，是风景点。（想 了想）我带你go Luhuitou . F: Luhuitou? G: Yes. (指着300句鹿雕像的封面) Luhuitou。 F: Oh, it's a deer. G: 对，对 Yes, yes, deer(爹),deer(爹)。（亮相）deer(爹)回头. F: 爹回头？ （奶奶，外宾左下，黎族姑娘右上，奶奶，外宾左上） F: Oh, a deer. G: 我们到了。 Lg: Hello, welcome to Luhuitou Park. F: Hello. G: 姑娘，你给咱老外朋友讲一讲鹿回头的故事，好不好？ Lg: 好的。（对外宾）Have you ever heard the story of "luhuitou"? F: A story? No. Lg: This story is about a young man and a deer long long ago. F: A young man and a deer.（指塑像） Do you mean the man and the deer here? Lg: Yes. He was a hunter . F: A hunter? Lg: Yes. One day, the young man went hunting and found the deer. F: Oh, I see. Lg: When the deer saw him, it ran away. The young man ran after the deer until they reached the edge of the cliff. Suddenly, the deer turned its head and became a girl. F: The deer turned into a girl? Really? Lg: Yes. F: (指塑像) I think this must be the girl. Lg: Right. Do you know about the Li People? F: Li People? Yes. Lg: Later, the young man and the fairy girl fell in love with each other and they got married. They were the ancestors of the Li People. F: This is really a beautiful story. And that is why Sanya is also called the "Deer City", isn't it? Lg: Yes, you are right. F: Thank you for your wonderful story. Are there any other scenic spots in Sanya? Lg: Yes, there are many others. I suggest you go to Dadonghai, Yalong Bay and Tianyahaijiao. F: Tianyahaijiao? What does it mean? （黎族小伙子上） Lb: Welcome to Tianyahaijiao. （众转身） F: What does it mean by "Tianyahaijiao"? Lb: It means "the end of the earth. G: （对Lg）Sea 是什么？ Lg: 是大海。(奶奶练读) F: Tianyahaijiao is one of the famous scenic spots in China, isn't it? G:(对观众) 我知道，China 是中国。 Lb: Yes . A lot of people from home and abroad have visited "Tianyahaijiao" and they say "Tianyahaijiao" has impressed them.. F: Yes. It's a nice place. Lb: There are poems and songs written about "Tianyahaijiao".(播放歌曲) Listen, this is one of the songs. Its name is "Please come to "Tianyahaijiao". F: It sounds sweet. I enjoy it. G: 孩子们，我今天学了一些English, 你们听一听，帮一帮奶奶好不好？“银行”是"bank", "怕死婆" 是什么来了？ Lg: Passport 是护照。 G: 哦，" 怕死婆" 就是“护照”。还有“爹”是“鹿”，“sea”是“大海”。我听你们说那个“beautiful(比特夫)是什么？ Lg: 不是比特夫，是beautiful。 G: 哦，是beautiful.(练习) F: Ladies and gentlemen, Sanya City is a beautiful city. I am glad to see everyone speak English here in Sanya. This granny is also learning English. It is very convenient for us to come for holidays and do business in Sanya. When I go back to the States, I will tell my friends to come to Sanya. All: Please come to Sanya. Welcome to Sanya.