英语翻译经典笑话

近些年,冷笑话作为一种特殊的幽默方式在互联网、电视节目、书籍杂志上广泛流传。我精心收集了英语笑话大全带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!

神奇的高尔夫球

A golfer, playing a round by himself, is about to tee off, and a greasy little salesman runs up to him, and yells, "Wait! Before you tee off, I have something really amazing to show you!"

一个高尔夫球手正要发球，跑上来一个无限谄媚的小个子推销员，喊到：“ 等一下。在您发球前，我请您看一样超神奇的东西。”

The golfer, annoyed, says, "What is it?"

高尔夫球手颇感被打搅，说道：“什么东西啊?”

"It's a special golf ball," says the salesman. "You can never lose it!"

“是一个很特别的高尔夫球 - 一个永远不会被弄丢的球!”

"you can never lose it"，scoffs the golfer, "What if you hit it into the water?

“永远不会丢的球”，高尔夫球手嘲讽地说，“如果球被打到水里呢?”

"No problem," says the salesman. "It floats, and it detects where the shore is, and spins towards it."

“没问题。它能漂起来，还能探测到哪里是岸，然后自己就能转到岸边。”

"Well, what if you hit it into the woods?"

“那么如果掉到树丛里呢?”

"Easy," says the salesman. "It emits a beeping sound, and you can find it with your eyes closed."

“简单。它能发出嘟嘟声，这样你就能循声而至了。”

"Okay," says the golfer, impressed. "But what if your round goes late and it gets dark?"

“那如果天黑了怎么找它呢?”

"No problem, sir, this golf ball glows in the dark! I'm telling you, you can never lose this golf ball!"

“球会在黑暗中发光啊!一句话，你永远不会找不到这个球。”

The golfer buys it at once. "Just one question," he says to the salesman. "Where did you get it?"

高尔夫球手当即买下这个球，随口问了一句：“你从哪搞到它的?”

"I found it."

“是我捡到的啦!”

It was a woman's first time on a plane. She boarded the plane and found herself a windowseat.

一位女士头一回坐飞机。她登机后发现自己的座位仅靠窗子。

After she settled in, a man came over and insisted that she was in his seat. She ignored himand told him to go away.

她坐好后，一位男士走过来坚持说她坐了他的位子。这位女士根本不听，只告诉他走开。

"Okay," replied the man. "If that's the way you want it, you fly the plane."

“好吧，”男士回答道。“如果你真想这样，你来开飞机吧。”

A couple had been married for 25 years and were celebrating their 60th birthdays, which fell onthe same day.

一对夫妇结婚已经25年了，正在一起庆祝他们的结婚纪念日和60岁生日。

During the celebration a fairy appeared and said that because they had been such a lovingcouple for all 25 years, she would give them one wish each.

正庆祝时，一位仙女从天而降说25年来他们一直相亲相爱，她将实现他们每个人一个愿望。

The wife wanted to travel around the world. The fairy waved her hand, and Boom! She had thetickets in her hand.

妻子说想环游世界。仙女握住了她的手，只听轰的一声。妻子手中出现了各种入场券和票。

Next, it was the husband's turn. He paused for a moment, then said shyly, "Well, I'd like tohave a woman 30 years younger than me."

接着就该丈夫许愿了。他顿了一下，然后不好意思地说：“嗯，我想要一个比我年轻30岁的妻子。”

The fairy picked up her wand, and Boom! He was ninety.

仙女拿起魔杖，只听轰的一声!丈夫变成90岁的老翁了。

Boy:Honey,my love of you is beyond expression.

小伙子:亲爱的,我对你的爱,简直无法用语言来表达.

Girl:Then you can use money to express it.

姑娘:那你就用金钱来表达吧!

英语笑话带翻译3篇

笑话往往是指能引人发笑的`谈话或故事。作为文体,篇幅短小,故事情节简单而巧妙,往往出人意料,取得令人捧腹的艺术效果。以下是我整理的英语笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!

How Did You Ever Get Here

你是怎样来的?

One winter morning, an employee explained why he had shown up for work 45 minutes late. "It was so slippery out that for every step I took ahead, I slipped back two."

一个冬天的早晨，一名雇员解释他为什么迟到了四十五分钟才起来上班。“外面太滑了，我每向前迈一步，就要向后退两步。”

The boss eyed him suspiciously. "Oh, yeah? Then how did you ever get here?"

老板狐疑地看着他。“噢，是吗?那你是怎样到这里来的?”

"I finally gave up," he said, "and started for home."

“后来我决定放弃，”他说，“然后我就往家里走。”

One Side of the Case

一面之辞

A judge asked our group of potential jurors whether anyone should be excused, and one man raised his hand.

一位法官问我们这群修补陪审员是否有人应当免权。一个人举起了手。

"I can't hear out of my left ear," the man told the judge.

“我的左耳听不见。”那人告诉法官。

"Can you hear out of your right ear?" the judge asked. The man nodded his head.

“你的右边耳朵听得见吗?”法官问道。那人点了点头。

"You'll be allowed to serve on the jury," the judge declared. "We only listen to one side of the case at a time."

“你将被允许加入陪审团，”法官宣布。“我们每次只听一面之辞。

Early Shopper

采购过早

It was Christmas and the judge was in a benevolent mood as he questioned the prisoner. "What are you charged with?" he asked.

那天是圣诞节，法官在审讯犯人时也有点恻隐之心。“你为什么而被起诉?”他问。

"Doing my christmas shopping early," replied the defendant.

“采购圣诞节物品过早。”被告答。

"That's no offense," replied the judge, "How early were you doing this shopping?"

“这不算犯法，”法官回答，“你购物多早?”

"Before the store opened," countered the prisoner.

在商店开门之前，“犯人应道。