英语小笑话英文

民间笑话是一种颇受人们喜爱的民间叙事类型,材料丰富,有广泛的现实基础。我精心收集了英语短笑话带翻译，供大家欣赏学习!英语短笑话带翻译篇1 Liar,Liar 骗子，骗子 A wife went to the police station with her next-door neighbor to report that her husband wasmissing. 老婆与隔壁邻居到警察局报案 说她的老公失踪了。 The policeman asked her for a description. 警察要求，她形容一下。 She said,"He is 35 years old,6 feet 4 inches,has dark eyes,dark wavy hair,an athleticbuild,weighs 185 pounds,is soft-spoken ,and is good to the children." 她说：“他三十五岁，六尺四寸，黑眼睛，波浪状的深色头发;体格健壮，体重185磅，说话很轻，而且对小孩子很好。” The next-door neighbor protested, 隔壁邻居期提出反驳说： "Your husband is 5 feet 4 inches,chubby,bald,has a big mouth,and is mean to your children." “你老公五尺四寸，胖嘟嘟 的，秃头，有一个太嘴巴，而且对你的小孩很刻薄。” The wife replied,"Yes,but who wants"THIS KIND OF STUFF"back?" 老婆回答说：“你说对了，可是谁会要 这种没用的废物 回来呀?” 英语短笑话带翻译篇2 A Henpecked Husband 怕老婆的老公 A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. 有一位怕老婆的老公接受心理治疗师的建议要坚持自己的主见。 "You don't have to let your wife bully you,"he said."Go home and show her you are the boss ." 他说：“你不必让你的老婆像恶霸一样欺侮你。回家去让她知道你才是老大。” The husband decided to take the doctor's asvice.He went home,slammed the door,shook his first in his wife's face,and growled," 这位老公决定接受医生的劝告。他回到家，用力啪答一声关上门，在他老婆的面前：挥舞着拳头，并且大声咆哮说： From now on you are talking orders from me. “从现在起，你得乖乖听我的命令。 I want my supper right now,and when you get it on the table ,go upstairs and lay out my clothes. 我现在就要吃晚餐，当你把它弄好放在餐桌上的时候，到楼上去把我的衣服摆放好。 Tonight I am going out with my friends. 今天晚上我要和我的。朋友外出， You are going to stay at home where you belong. 你给我乖乖待在家里不许乱跑。 Another thing,you know who is going to tie bow tie?" 另外还有一件事情，你知道谁要替我打蝴蝶结领结吗?” I certainlydo,"screamed the wife."The Undertaker." 老婆尖叫着说:“我当然知道。是收尸的人。” 英语短笑话带翻译篇3 向你的烦恼说再见 A Jew, an Indian and a black were lined up to enter the Kingdom of Heaven. 一位犹太人、一位印第安人和一位黑人列队进入天国之门。 Said the Jew to St. Peter, 66 Frankly, I'm rather surprised to be here. All my life Christians havedespised and reviled me. " 那位犹太人对圣彼得说：“坦白讲，能到这里让我蛮惊讶的，我一辈子一直都受到__的轻视和侮辱。” "That's a great sorrow to us,"said St. Peter, "but you won't find that kind of prejudice here.Here, all are truly equal.Just spell God and you may enter." “我们实在感到非常遗憾，”圣彼得说，“但我们这里没有那样的偏见，这里每个人都完全平等，只要拼出God这个词你就能进入天堂。” the Jew truly spell out god and was swept through the gates.Next,the Indian came forward andsaid,"St.Peter,all my life I suffered from poverty and discrimination,and could only live in areservation.Will I truly be free here?" 那名犹太人正确地拼出God后，被招入门内。接着印第安人走向前说道“圣彼得，我一辈子饱受贫穷和种族歧视的打击，而且只能住在居留地内，我在这里能得到真正的自由吗?” "My son, your troubles are over.Just spell the word God you will be free as a bird. " “小兄弟，你的烦恼已经结束了，只要拼出God这个词，你就能像小鸟一样自由自在。” The Indian obliged and he, too, entered the Heavenly Kingdom. 印第安人照着做，不久也被引入天堂。 Next,the black man strode forward."St. Peter," he said, "all my life people looked down on meand treated me unfairly.That won't happen here, will it?" 接着那名黑人跨步向前，“圣彼得，”他说道，“一辈子人们都瞧不起我，不公平对待我，在这里那些事不会发生吧!” "Of course not, my boy. We don't do that kind of thing here.Just spell" onomatopoeia "and theKingdom of Heaven is yours " “当然不会，我的弟兄，我们不会做那样的事，只要拼出onomatopoeia这个词，天堂之国就是你的了!” 看了“英语短笑话带翻译”的人还看了： 1. 英语爆笑笑话 2. 有关于英文笑话带翻译简短 3. 英文短笑话带翻译欣赏 4. 英语笑话带翻译 5. 关于超短英文笑话带翻译

#英语小笑话#英语和中文一样，都有各自的特色，笑话也是大有不同，接下来我们就来看看一些英语中的笑话吧~ 1. Why is the doctor so angry?为什么医生那么生气？ A: Because he has no patience. 因为他没有耐心呀。 笑点：耐心=patience，病人=patient 一语双关2. What do you call an alligator in a vest?鳄鱼穿了背心会变成什么？ A: An Investigator. 调查员 笑点：这个点在读音，investigator = in + vest + alligator3. Why can't you give Elsa a balloon?你为什么不能给Elsa（《冰雪奇缘》女主角）气球？ A: Because she will Let it go. 因为她会让气球跑掉。 笑点：《冰雪奇缘》的主题曲就是“Let it go”。小朋友一定能知道这个梗。4. What do you call a computer that sings?会唱歌的电脑叫什么？ A: A-Dell Adele 笑点：A Dell（一台戴尔电脑）和著名歌手Adele也是谐音。 5. What do you get from a pampered cow?一头被宠坏的奶牛会给你些什么？ A: Spoiled milk. 坏掉的牛奶。 笑点：Spoil做动词是“宠溺”，spoiled做形容词也有变质的意思。一语双关。6. What do you call a bee that lives in America?住在美国的蜜蜂叫啥？ A: USB 笑点：美国是U.S. U.S.+ bee = USB7.Your brain has two parts: left &right. Your left brain has nothing right, Your right brain has nothing left.你的大脑有两个部分：左脑和右脑，你的左脑里没有右脑的东西，你的右脑里没有左脑的东西。笑点解析：right同上；left作形容词时意为左边的，作leave的过去分词使用时意为剩下的。所以后面两句还可以理解为“你的左脑里没有一点正确的东西，你的右脑里什么也不剩。”（我才不会直接说你笨呢）。今日的小笑话先讲到这儿，你还知道哪些呢？ 今日词汇: not so much as …甚至于…都没有set sb to do 使某人做 be determined upon … 对…意志坚定 a strip of 呈条带状的一片 divide sth into 把...分成 at the end of 在...尽头；在...结束时 a great deal of 大量 look back upon 回忆；回顾

1.What's the best day to eat fried fish and chips?那一天是最好的日子去吃炸鱼和薯片？Fry-Day (近似"friday")2.What's the best month to eat toast?那一个月是最好的月份去吃土司？Jam-uary(jam意为果酱，而jam-uary又近似january一月，所以答案为一月）3.What do you get if you eat too much dessert?当你吃太多的点心时你会得什么？A stomach-cake(本题答案想表达的是肚子痛，此答案和肚子痛stomach-ache相近）4.Monster school pupil: What are we cooking for lunch today?怪物学院学生：今天的午饭要煮什么？Monster school teacher: Shut up and go to the stove.怪物学院老师：闭嘴并去到撸子里。4. What's worse than finding a slug in your salad?有什麼比找到鼻涕虫塞在你的沙拉？A half slug.半个鼻涕虫。5.“waiter,waiter.There are some worms on my plate".服务员，服务员，我的盘子里有一些虫子！"I didn't see any worms.Those are your sausages.我并没有看到什么虫子,那些是你的香肠。6.Why did the man stare at the carton of orange juice？为什麼男人盯著橙汁纸箱？Because it said 'concentrate'.因为它说：“集中”。 7.Mother: Why are you jumping up and down? Tom: I've just taken some medicine and I forgot to shake the bottle. 妈妈：你为什么不停地跳上跳下的？ 汤姆：我刚吃完药，可我忘了先摇动瓶子了8.A bit of advice for those about to retire. If you are only 65, never move to a retirement community. Everybody else is in their 70s, 80s, or 90s. So when something has to be moved, lifted or loaded, they yell,'Get the kid.' 这里想对将要退休者提一点忠告。如果你只有65岁的话，千万别进退休社区。因为那里人人都七八十岁或者八九十岁了。每当要搬东西，抬东西或者装东西时，他们就叫喊，“让小的干吧。”9.Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen? Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window, and he won. 他赢了 汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？ 约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆：真糟糕，怎么回事儿？ 约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。 10.I Have His Ear in My Pocket Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan. "Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother. "I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket." 他的耳朵在我衣兜里 伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发生了什么事？” “一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。 “再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。 “他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢。”