英语小笑话短一点

非常短的英语小笑话

当听别人说笑话的时候觉得不大好笑，还会觉得冷很冷，可是自己看的时候，却笑到不行，你有这样的经历么?以下的非常短的英语小笑话，希望能让你欢乐笑不停。

纹身

A few months after Tom and I were married一during World War II, he was shipped off to Pearl Harbor. In one of his first letters，he wrote，"I'm going to have a Navy battle-ship tattooed on my chest.”

二战中，汤姆和我刚结婚几个月，他就被派到珍珠港。在他早期的一封信中，他写道:“我想把海军战舰纹刻在胸前。”

Instead of pleading, I answered simply,“Send me a pitcture of your tattoo，and I'll have a duplicate put on my chest. "

我没有劝阻，只是简单地回了信:“给我寄一张你纹旁的照片来，然后我也在我的'胸前仿纹一个。”

We have been married for 51 years. Neither of us has a tattoo.

我们现在已结婚51年了，谁也没纹过身。

关心

A customer at my teller's window was grumbling about the low interest rate on his savings account. He finally said he was just going to take all his money out of the bank，dig a hole in his back yard and bury it.

一位顾客站在我的出纳窗口前，埋怨存钱的利率太低。最后，他说他妥把所有的钱从银行里取出来，在自家后院挖个坑，把钱理了。

The teller next to rne leaned over. "Sir，I couldn't help overhearing. Tell me, what is your address?".

隔壁窗口的出纳员探过身来说:“先生，我实在不怒愉听，但还是听到了，告诉我，您住在什么地才?”

过分紧张

My little girl loves animals，but one day she was bitten by a small field mouse she'd found. She carried it home in her pocket and told me what happened. Worried about rabies，I called our town humane society and was told that the animal would have to be examined, and they'd send someone for it.

我的小女儿喜欢动物。但有一天，她被一只她找到的小田鼠咬了一口。她把那小动物放在口袋里带了回来，并把所发生的一切都告诉了我。由于害怕她被传染上鼠痊，我给镇上的私区医院打了电话。他们告诉我这个小动物应被检查一下，还说他们会派人去把它取走。

When the humane-society truck pulled up，a big man got out，put on a pair of gauntlets and took a capture stick and a big cage from the back of the truck. Trying not to laugh, I handed him a small shoe box containing the mouse.

社区医院的卡车停在了我家门口，一个大个子下了车，他戴上了防护手套，从车的后箱里取出一根棍子和一个笼子。我

尽量克制自己不笑出来，把那装有小田鼠的杜盒子递给了他。

"Lady，"he said，seeing my expression, "they only told me it was a wild animal. "

“太太，”当他看到我的表情时他说，“他们只告诉我说是好生动物。”

异奇!

My first waitressing job was in a coffee shop. We featured a lunch special called "Tuna Salad Surprise"，a tuna sandwich served with soup and chips. When our sandwich maker didn't show up for work one hectic Saturday，we had to prepare our own sandwiches.

我做招待工作始于咖啡店。我们有道午餐特餐叫“金枪鱼沙拉异奇”。这个套餐实际上就是把金枪鱼三明治、汤、薯条技在一起吃.一个例霉竹星期六，我们那做特餐三明治的

厨师没来上班，我们只好自己准备三明治。

A man sat down and ordered the special. I raced to the sandwich board，prepared the order，poured his coffee and rushed to the next customer. Later，as I delivered his check,he noted politely that he had never. eaten a potato-salad sandwich before. Horrified at my mistake，I asked，”Why didn't you tell me it was potato salad instead of tuna?"

一位男食客坐下来，要了这道特餐。我跑到了三明治拒台，替他准备好了套餐，又给他倒了一杯咖啡，就开始招待下一位食容。不久，我把帐单递给了要特餐的食客.他很礼

貌地说，他从没吃过土豆沙拉三明治。这时我才意识到我把三明治弄错了，我真有点害怕了。我问他:“你为什么不早告诉我特餐是土豆沙拉而不是金枪鱼沙拉呢?”

"I thought that was the surprise.”

“我还以为那就是所谓的异奇呢.

笑话,顾名思义,是一种通过幽默的文字或图示来达到令人会心一笑或捧腹大笑效果的文学形式。我精心收集了最简短的英语笑话，供大家欣赏学习!

嫩的稀奇!

Like most colleges，the food at St. Mary's College of Maryland scores low marks for both quality and variety.One exception is our annual steak-and-shrimp

night;but even this cari t escape the critics.

像很多大学一样，玛丽兰的圣·玛丽学院的伙食无论从花样上，还是从质量上评分都作低。咋一的例外是我们每年的牛排大虾之夜。但，即使是这天的食品，也很难逃脱评论

家的评论。我听到一个学生说:“这块牛排应烧得再嫩一点儿。”

"This steak could be a little more rare ," I overheard a fellow student say.

她的同伴说:“小声点儿，一年一次就够稀奇的了。(注:英语中，嫩和稀奇都是rare。)

"Pipe down,"whispered her companion. "Once a year is rare enough !”

经验

The manager of a fast-food franchise was approached by a teenager looking for a job. "Have you had any experience with fast food?"the manager asked.

一位少年来封一家快餐馆找工作，经理问他:“你有在快餐店工作的经脸吗7"

The young man paused for a moment.“Well，“he replied，”I've eaten a lot of it.”

年轻人想了想说:“这么说吧，我吃过很多次快餐。”

买书，但不用!

" This is the book recommended this quarter,”announced my political science professor on the first day of class. "However，we won't use it much, because my primary purpose is to teach you to think.”

“这段时间，我推荐你们用这本书。”政治经济学教授在我们的第一堂课上说。“可是，我们这本书用得不多。因为，我的主要目的是想教你们怎样思维。”

Angered that my hard-earned money had been wasted,I raised my hand，”You mean I just spent$22. 50 on a book I won't need?"

听到这儿我感到很气愤。难道我辛苦挣来的钱就这么浪费掉了吗?于是，我举手问:“您是说，我刚花了22. 5美元买了本我们不用的书?”

" Good，"replied the professor with a smile."Your re starting to think already."

“很好!"教授笑着说:“你已经开始思考了。”