Three peting store owners rented adjoining shops in a mall. Observers waited for mayhem to ensue.
The retailer on the right put up huge signs saying, "Gigantic Sale!" and "Super Bargains!"
The store on the left raised bigger signs proclaiming, "Prices Slashed!" and "Fantastic Discounts!"
The owner in the middle then prepared a large sign that simply stated, "ENTRANCE".
中间战术
三个互相争生意的商店老板在一条商业街上租用了毗邻的店铺。旁观者等着瞧好戏。
右边的零售商挂起了巨大的招牌,上书:“大减价!”“特便宜!”
左边的商店挂出了更大的招牌,声称:“大砍价!”“大折扣!”
中间的商人随后准备了一个大招牌,上面只简单地写着:“入口处”。
Very Pleased to Meet You
During World War II, a lot of young women in Britain were in the army. Joan Phillips was one of them. She worked in a big camp, and of course met a lot of men, officers and soldiers.
One evening she met Captain Humphreys at a dance. He said to her, "I‘m going abroad tomorrow, but I‘d be very happy if we could write to each other." Joan agreed, and they wrote for several months.
Then his letters stopped, but she received one from another officer, telling her that he had been wounded and was in a certain army hospital in England.
Joan went there and said to the matron, "I‘ve e to visit Captain Humphreys."
"Only relatives are allowed to visit patients here," the matron said.
"Oh, that‘s all right," answered Joan. "I‘m his sister."
"I‘m very pleased to meet you," the matron said, "I‘m his mother!"
Two soldiers were in camp. The first one‘s name was Gee, and the second one‘s name was Bill. Gee said, "have you got a piece of paper and an envelope, Bill?"
Bill said, "Yes, I have," and he gave them to him.
Then Gee said, "Now I haven‘t got a pen." Bill gave him his, and Gee wrote his letter. Then he put it in the envelope and said, "have you got a stamp, Bill?" Bill gave him one.
Then Bill got up and went to the door, so Gee said to him, "Are you going out?"
Bill Said, "Yes, I am," and he opened the door.
Gee said, "Please put my letter in the box in the office, and..." He stopped.
"What do you want now?" Bill said to him.
Gee looked at the envelope of his letter and answered, "What‘s your girl-friend‘s address?"
At the small zoo camel ask: "Mother Mother, why do we eyelashes so long?" Camel mother said: "When the wind came, the long eyelashes will enable us to be able to see the direction of the storm." small camel asked: "Mother Mother, why do we camels back then, the die ugly!" camel mother, said: "This is called hump, you can help us store a lot of water and nutrients, so that we can tolerate more than a dozen in the desert day of potable water without conditions. "small camel asked:" Mother Mother, why do we so thick the soles of the feet? "camel mother said:" That will enable us to many of the body is not stuck in soft sand, to facilitate long-distance ah journey. "small camel pleased bad:" Wow, so useful that we ah!! But mother, why we are still in zoos, do not desert hiking? "
2、The Boys And The Frogs 男孩和青蛙
One spring day some naughty boys were playing near a pond. They began to throw stones into the water. In the pond lived many frogs were much afraid of the boys, for the stones hurt some of the frogs. At last an old frog lifted his head out of the water and said, ¨Boys, please don‟t throw stones at us.〃The boys said, ¨We are only playing.〃 ¨I know that, but please stop throwing stones, my boys. What is play to you is death to us,〃 said the old frog. So the boys stopped throwing stones and went away. 春天里的一天,一些顽皮的男孩在一个水塘边玩耍。他们开始往水里扔石块。许多生活在水塘里的青蛙非常害怕这些男孩,因为石头曾弄伤了他们中的'一些。最后一只老青蛙把他的脑袋探出水面,他说:“孩子们,请别向我们扔石头。”男孩说:“我们只是在玩耍。”“我知道,但请别扔石头,孩子们。对你们而言的玩耍对我们可意味着死亡。”老青蛙说。因此男孩们不再扔石头并且离开了
3. A Good Boy
Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yestrday?"
"I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered.
"You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"
4. The Fox. and the Crow
A Fox once saw a Crow fly off with a piece of cheese in its beak and settle on a branch of a tree. „That‟s for me, as I am a Fox,‟ said Master Reynard, and he walked up to the foot of the tree. „Good-day, Mistress Crow,‟ he cried. „How well you are looking to-day: how glossy your feathers; how bright your eye. I feel sure your voice must surpass that of other birds, just as your figure does; let me hear but one song from you that I may greet you as the Queen of Birds.‟ The Crow lifted up her head and began to caw her best, but the moment she opened her mouth the piece of cheese fell to the ground, only to be snapped up by Master Fox. „That will do,‟ said he. „That was all I wanted. In exchange for your cheese I will give you a piece of advice for the future. ‟Do not trust flatterers.‟
5、The Thirsty Pigeon口渴的鸽子
A PIGEON, oppressed by excessive thirst, saw a goblet of water painted on a signboard. Not supposing it to be only a picture, she flew towards it with a loud whir and unwittingly dashed against the signboard, jarring herself terribly. Having broken her wings by the blow, she fell to the ground, and was caught by one of the bystanders.