英语原创简短剧本

提供两个六人表演的英语短话剧剧本 一、白雪公主英语短话剧 SW-白雪公主 Q-皇后 M-魔镜 H-猎人P-白马王子 D-小矮人 音乐起，旁白 A long time ago, In a beautiful kingdom, there lived a young king and queen, the people loved them so much; the queen died while giving birth to a girl, her name was Snow White, She was a beautiful princess. Year passed, the king got married again, The people didn't love the new queen, because she was cruel. One day, In the king's palace： ----白雪出场 S.w: My name is Snow white , I am a beautiful princess, I miss my mother so much, Where is my mother ? Where is my mother ？ 音乐起，皇后、魔镜出场 Q: I am a queen , I'm very beautiful , Where is Mirror ? Mirror , Mirror on the wall , who's the most beautiful ? M: Snow white is much more beautiful than you ! Q: Hunter, go kill Snow white . 猎人出场 H: Yes, my queen音乐起，猎人追赶白雪，公主惊慌出逃 S.w: Help me ,help me, please, please ！ 白雪顺利脱逃后 S.w: I am tried and hungry, oh, there is a little house , I will eat a little and lie down. 音乐起，7个小矮人出场， D: 1\Look, somebody ate my food---- 2\Somebody drank my water---- 3\Someone is sleeping now---- 4\What a beautiful girl！---- 小矮人睡觉----音乐起公主先醒了----小矮人醒了----对话 5\How do you do? S.w: How do you do? My name is Snow white … Nice to meet you! D：（齐说）Nice to meet you ,too---- 6\ welcome to our house!---- 7\Would you like to live here? S.W: My pleasure, thank you very much! D: Let's go out for our work, bye-bye, Snow white. 皇后、魔镜出场 Q: Mirror, mirror on the wall , who's the most beautiful? M: Snow white is much more beautiful than you! Q: What ? Snow white is not dead ? Hahaha, I got a good idea！ 音乐起，皇后扮演老太太出场，对话 Q: Apple ,apple, beautiful apple, S.w: Hello, Good morning grandma! Q: pretty girl ,would you like a bite? S.w: Oh, yes ,thank you grandma！ 白雪公主咬一口后倒地 Q: The girl is dead! Hahaha… 小矮人出场、围着公主哭 Snow white wake up, wake up… 音乐起，小矮人引着王子出场 P: A beautiful girl! She shall be my queen！ 王子唤醒公主，公主醒了 P:Wake up ! Wake up , my queen ! S.w: Thank you for your help ! P: My pleasure ！ 音乐起，小矮人、公主、王子跳起欢快的舞。

二、Dont Touch Me! 6人话剧剧本 Vicky和Lisa是某餐馆的服务员，一天，一个顾客对Vicky。.人物 Allen Jim Kuki Fenix Vicky Lisa Cast1. Vicky︰a waitress at Monday's restaurant. She is a hard working girl.2. Lisa︰another waitress at Monday's restaurant. She is a kind and naive girl. 3. Fenix︰one of customers. He's a very ill-natured customer.4. Allen and Tim︰customers at Monday's restaurant. They're good and decent men.5. Kuki︰the boss of the restaurant.Scene I(One afternoon, there are many customers at the Monday's restaurant.) Vicky and Lisa talk and go to the kitchen, and then the boss, kuki, comes in, too.Kuki: Hey, there are many customers today. Girls, work hard. Remember, God gives all things to industry.Lisa: Yeah. I know.Vicky: We will do our best.The door opens now. Two men come in.Kuki moves to the door.Kuki: May I help you, sir? Two people? Come with me, I will take you to the table. Allen: Yes, pleases.Tim: I'm starving. I hope I can eat the best food in this restaurant right now.Kuki: (laughing) Just a moment. Two men walk in the restaurant. Lisa walks toward them.Vicky:This is the menu, sirs. Allen&Tim: Thank you.After a few minutes. Lisa and Vicky walk to the kitchen.Lisa: Hey, Vicky. I don't like that customer. See, that man sits near the door.Vicky: Why? Does he make any troubles for you?Lisa: I don't know. I feel…….Oh, I just don't like the way he looks at me.Scene II Vicky delivers a dish to the table where Allen and Tim sit.Vicky: (talks to herself) Lisa is right. The way that man looks at me makes me uncomfortable.Vicky delivers a dish again to Fenix's table.Vicky: Here is your meal, sir. Enjoy it, please.Vicky turns to the kitchen. At this moment, Fenix touches her back!Vicky: Wow~~~~ (she screams.) Kuki: (runs to Vicky) what happened?Vicky: He, he……He touched me!Fenix: No!! I didn't.Lisa: You lie!! I see you did that. What I say is an absolute truth. Other customers gather around them to。

On The Way Home回家的路上 Six high school students are walking on their way home, talking, laughing， 。

六个高中生走在回家的路上，一边聊天，一边笑. A: hey, guys, what are you going to do when you get home？ 喂，伙伴们，你们放学后干什么啊？ B: I'm going to watch the soccer game replay.My parents won't let me watch in the early morning.I'm so mad at them. 我要看足球重播.我爸妈不让我大清早起来看.我还在生他们的气呢. All:(sing)If you're mad and you know it stamp your feet(everybody stamps his feet) 大伙（唱） 如果你知道你生气你就跺跺你的脚（跺脚） C: I think I'm going to get something to eat first. I'm so hungry. 我一回家就要找吃的.饿死我了. ALL:(Sing) If you're hungry and you know it touch your tummy,mmm。(everybody toches his tummy) 大伙（唱）如果你知道你饿了你就摸摸你的肚皮（摸肚皮） A:(to D) what about you? A（对D说） 你呢？ D:(pretend to yawn)I can't wait to lie down on my sofa. I'm so sleepy.(yawn again) D：（装打哈欠）我恨不得马上躺在沙发上.真困！（打哈欠） All except E:(sing)If you're sleepy and you know it take a nap(pretend to take a nap while yawning) 大伙E除外：（唱）如果你知道你困了你就打个盹（打盹） all of a sudden, A realizes E is nowhere to be found. 突然，A 意识到E不见了. A:(to F)E,where is E? A（对F说） E, F 呢？ F: I have no idea. He was with us one minute ago. 不知道呀.刚才还在啊. Eeverybody turns around looking for E. 大伙四处寻找E B: Look! there he is! (pointing ) 在那！ 他在那！（手指远处） C: oh oh, he is with a stray dog. 不好了，他和一个流浪狗在一起. D: I know he likes dogs. 他喜欢狗. F: but that dog looks mean. 但那狗样子很凶唉. A: we'd better tell him to stay away from that mean looking dog. 我们快叫他别理那狗. Everybody: (shouting) E! Come back! Come Back！ 大伙（大声叫）E！ 回来！回来！ B: Oh my god! He is bleeding！ 天啊！他流血了！ D: The dog bit him！ 他被狗咬了！ F: Hurry up！ 快过去看看！ Everybody runs to E. E moans in pain.(pretend moaning) 大伙跑过去.E 疼痛地叫着（装疼叫） ALL: (to E)are you all right？ 你怎么样？ E: (shakes his head and keeps moaning) （摇头，疼叫） A: let's call for help！ 快叫救护.！ All: help! Help！ 有人被狗咬了！有人被狗咬了！ They can not find any help nearby. 附近没有人. B: Let me carry him to the hospital. 我背他去医院吧！ All: let's go！ 走！ B picks up E and carries him on his back. B 背起E. They walk to the hospital. 他们朝医院走去. The End 剧终。

女儿：S父亲：F母亲：M场景1:S:Morning mom.M: moruing dear.M:Why don't you sit down and eat your breakfast?S:ok.M:Did you finish your homework dear?S:yesM:Did you brush your teeth?S:mom,I haven't finished eating breakfast yet.I'll brush my teeth when I'm down.M:Sandy,What's wrong with you arm?S:nothing。

M:Come here. Let me see. Sandy,you have tattoos?S:No! this is a picture I was draw. Look! Clean! not really tattoos.M:Sandy, I'm sure it's not good for you.I've seen other teenagers walking around town with tattoos and prercingsall over their bodies.they are not good students.I can't believe you have same with them.S:mom,it's so cool in our school.My peers say the tattoos is very beautiful,and I think it's art.M:Tattoos is art?my god。 Now, I don't have time to talk with you.I'm late,I've got to go.Tonight we must havefamily meeting to discuss your mind,it's the biggest problem with you.S:What's wrong with my mind?You don't understand me!(S：照镜子，听音乐，打电话)场景2:F:Sandy,Why don't you go to school?S:I'm free this morning.F:You always take a phone with your friend.It's waste too much time for youself,and you never talk about study,your topic usually about makeup,music,chothing and "What's cool".S：（对电话里说）"call me later" Dad,I'm fifteen.I have my mind.I'm old enough to make a decision with my time andwhat should I do.I'm not a baby!F:I'm not agree with you.we should discuss about you.S:Oh。

again。 Why do you baffle me?F:What?S:Nothing。

(S: Hello,yes!I'm free。ok,see you later.)场景3:M:I think arm with tattoos is terriable.Is so danger that you can't change your mind.F:But the tattoos not ture,(S：点头)too much phone is the biggest problem.M:Dear,she is not alone,she want communicate with each other is good.F:Phone waste too much time!S:Now, the biggest problem is quarrel,not me。

.翻译：场景1 ：问：早上妈妈。男：今天上午亲爱的。

男：你为什么不坐下来吃饭的早餐？问：确定。男：你完成你的功课亲爱的？问：是男：你刷牙？问：妈妈，我还没有吃完早餐yet.I ，我刷我的牙齿当我下来。

男：沙地，有什么不好你胳膊？问：什么。男：来这里。

让我看看。沙地，您有纹身？S模式：不！这是一个图片我是抽奖。

看！清洁的！没有真正纹身。男：沙地，我相信这不是好you.I都有看到其他青少年走动镇纹身和prercings所有他们的bodies.they不好students.I不能相信你有与他们相同。

问：妈妈，这么酷的school.My同行说，纹身是非常漂亮，我认为这是艺术。男：纹身是艺术？我的上帝。

现在，我没有时间跟you.I '米晚了，我得go.Tonight我们必须有家庭会议，以讨论您的想法，这是最大的问题与您联系。问：有什么不好我心中？你不理解我吧！（ S模式：照镜子，听音乐，打电话）场景2 ：传真：沙地，你为什么不去上学？问：我今天上午免费。

传真：你总是需要一个电话与您friend.It的浪费太多时间为自己，你从来没有谈论研究，您的主题通常化妆，音乐， chothing和“什么是酷” 。问： （对电话里说） “后给我打电话”爸爸，我fifteen.I我mind.I '米，能够作出决定的时间和我应该怎么do.I '米不是一个婴儿！传真：我不同意you.we应该讨论你。

问：噢。 。

再次你为什么要困惑我吗？传真：什么？问：什么。（ S模式：您好，是的！我自由。

没关系，回头见。 ）场景3 ：男：我觉得手臂刺青是terriable.Is如此危险，你不能改变您的想法。

传真：但是纹身不自然， （ S模式：点头）太多手机是最大的问题。男：亲爱的，她并不孤单，她要互相沟通是好的。

传真：电话浪费太多时间！问：现在，最大的问题是争吵，而不是我。.。

SNOW WHITE CONTENTS SW---白雪公主 Q---皇后 M---魔镜 H---猎人 P---白马王子 D---小矮人 A---小动物 音乐起，旁白 A long time ago, In a beautiful kingdom, there lived a young king and queen, the people loved them so much; the queen died while giving birth to a girl, her name was Snow White, She was a beautiful princess. Year passed, the king got married again, The people didn't love the new queen, because she was cruel. One day, In the king's palace： ----白雪出场 S.w: My name is S.w , I am a beautiful princess, I miss my mother so much, Where is my mother? Where is my mother？ 音乐起，皇后、魔镜出场 Q: I am a queen, I'm very beautiful,Where is Mirror? Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who's the most beautiful? M: S.w is much more beautiful than you! Q: Hunter, go kill S.w. 猎人出场 H: Yes, my queen 音乐起，小动物出场，追赶猎人，公主惊慌出逃 S.w: Help me ,help me, please, please A: what's the matter with you? S.w: The hunter…hunter… A: bite you bite you … 小动物追赶猎人下场 S.w: I am tried and hungry, oh, there is a little house , I will eat a little and lie down. 音乐起，7个小矮人出场， D: 1\Look, somebody ate my food---- 2\somebody drank my water---- 3\someone is sleeping now---- 4\What a beautiful girl！---- 小矮人睡觉----音乐起公主先醒了----小矮人醒了----对话 5\How do you do? S.w: How do you do? My name is S.w … Nice to meet you! D： （齐说）Nice to meet you ,too---- 6\ welcome to our house!---- 7\Would you like to live here? S.w: My pleasure, thank you very much! D: Let's go out for our work, bye-bye, S.W 皇后、魔镜出场 Q: Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the most beautiful? M: S.w is much more beautiful than you! Q: What? S.w is not dead? Hahaha, I got a good idea！ 音乐起，皇后扮演老太太出场，对话 Q: Apple ,apple, beautiful apple, S.w: Hello, Good morning grandma! Q: pretty girl ,would you like a bite? S.w: Oh, yes ,thank you grandma！ 白雪公主咬一口后倒地 Q: The girl is dead! Hahaha… 小矮人出场、围着公主哭 S.w wake up, wake up… 音乐起，动物引着王子出场 P: A beautiful girl! She shall be my queen！ 王子吻公主，公主醒了 S.w: Thank you for your help! P: My pleasure 音乐起，小动物、小矮人、公主、王子跳起欢快的舞。

有部分修改，请酌情采纳

T-Teacher（老师） Student A&B（学生A、B） D-Doctor（校医） P-Parent（家长）

老师：（上课了，请掏出你们的语文书，今天我们学第一课。这位同学，你有问题吗？）

T: Class begins. Take out your Chinese book, please. We'll study the first text today.

「Student A holds his hand up.」

T: Any questions, boy?

举手同学：（老师，他有些不舒服，可能发烧了。）

A: He's not feeling very well, Sir. A fever, perhaps.

老师：（那你快送他去医务室吧。）

T: So quick, take him to the infrmary.

举手同学：（阿姨，他有些不舒服，可能发烧了，您能帮他看看吗？）

A: He's feeling quite sick, madam, and probably having a fever. Would you please take a look?

校医：（当然可以，量一下体温吧。）

D: Of course. Let me have your temperature.

过了一会儿

「 After a while.」

校医：（噢！38°6，看起来真的发烧了，让他给家长打电话吧）

D: Oh, 38.6( thirty-eight point six). It seems quite a fever. You'd better give your parent a ring.

嘟--嘟--

「 Dialing.」

生病的同学：（喂，妈妈，我发烧了，很难受，你能过来接我吗？）

B: Hello, is that mom? I'm fevered and quite sick, can you come and take me home?

家长：（噢！可怜的孩子，好的，我很快就到。）

P: OHh, poor boy! No problem, I'll be there in a few minutes.

十分钟后 家长到了

「 Ten minutes later, the parent arrives.」

家长：（孩子，我来接你了，回家休息吧）

P: Kid, I'm here to take you home. Let's go and have a good rest.

生病的同学：（好的，妈妈。）

B: Okay, mom.

他们一起回家了。

「 They go home together.」

英语小剧本-----小红帽 Little Red Riding Hood 第一场：Little Red Riding Hood家 Mum： （妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里） Little Red Riding Hood：（唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy, what are you doing? Mum： （一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandma is ill. Here are some apples and bananas for Grandma. Take them to Grandma. Little Red Riding Hood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok! Mum： （亲切地看着Little Red Riding Hood说） Be good. Be careful. Little Red Riding Hood: Yes ,mummy.Goodbye, mummy. Mum: Bye-bye. Darling. 第二场：在路上 （一阵轻快的音乐由远而近，Little Red Riding Hood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁） Little Red Riding Hood: Wow!Flowers, how beautiful！ （放下篮子采花）One flower ,two flowers, three flowers. Wolf：（随着一阵低沉的音乐，Wolf大步地走上台）I am wolf. I am hungry. （做找东西状，东张西望） Here is a little red riding hood. Hi! Little Red Riding Hood. Where are you going？ （做狡猾的样子和Little Red Riding Hood打招呼） Little Red Riding Hood：（手摸辫子，天真地回答）To Grandma's.Grandma is ill. Wolf：（自言自语）I' ll eat Grandma. But……（对Little Red Riding Hood说）Hey, look! 6 little baby ducks. Little Red Riding Hood：（和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞） Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后） Little Red Riding Hood：（停止跳舞）Hello! Baby ducks,how are you? Six Ducks:We' re fine.Thank you. Where are you going? Little Red Riding Hood:To Grandma's.Oh, I must go, bye. Six Ducks:Goodbye. 第三场：Grandma家 Grandma： （喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。）

Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）I am very hungry now. （做找寻的样子）Where is Grandma' s house？ （高兴地对观众说）Aha , it's here.（敲门）Bang, Bang, Bang. Grandma: Who is it? Wolf：（装出Little Red Riding Hood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It's me. Little Red Riding Hood. Grandma： （边说边起床） Come in, come in. Wolf：（得意洋洋地走到床边） Grandma , I'll eat you. Grandma： （惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上） 灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。 Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy!I'll sleep. Little Red Riding Hood：（高兴地敲门）Grandma.Grandma. Wolf：（装扮成Grandma的声音） Who is it? Little Red Riding Hood:It's me。

Little Red Riding Hood. What a strange noise! Wolf:Come in, Come in. Little Red Riding Hood：（蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌子上，走到床前一看，跳回几步）Oh! What are big ears! Wolf:I can listen to your sweet voice. Little Red Riding Hood:Wow! What a big eyes! Wolf:I can see you pretty face. Little Red Riding Hood:Oh! What a big hand. Wolf:I can hug you. Little Red Riding Hood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look! What a big hands? Wolf：（从床上跳起来说）I can eat you! Little Red Riding Hood：（拼命地跑）Oh!No! No! Wolf：（追到Little Red Riding Hood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It's delicious. I still sleep. I like sleeping. Hunter： （一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场）Where's the wolf? Look! A door.（推门）The wolf is sleeping. Wolf：（发出呼呼的响声） Hunter： （端起枪想打，又放下）What a big stomach！ （摸摸Wolf的肚子）Grandma and Little Red Riding Hood are inside .I must be hurry.（从桌子上拿起剪刀，举起） Look! Scissors. （做剪Wolf的肚子）Cut, cut, cut. Little Red Riding Hood/Grandma:Thank you. Hunter: Grandma ,give me some needles and thread. Little Riding Hood ,Give me some stones. Grandma： （从桌子上拿来针线） Little Red Riding Hood：（搬来几个石头）One, two, three. Hunter： （把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里） Grandma: I'll thread it. Hunter： （拿起枪）Woke up! Wolf：（起床，两手托着大肚子）My stomach is so heavy. Hunter: You big bad wolf, raise your arms! Wolf：（边跑边说） Help! Don't shot me! Hunter： （开枪）Bang, bang! Wolf： （应声倒下） Hunter: The bad wolf is dead. Little Red Riding Hood和Grandma:Yeah! Thank you. Little Red Riding Hood、Grandma、Hunter（一起鞠躬）： Thank you 答案补充 英语小剧本-----小红帽 。

剧本主要是由台词和舞台指示组成的，是戏剧艺术创作的文本基础，编导与演员演出的依据。以下是我精心整理的英语短剧剧本，欢迎大家分享。

角色：小兔、小狗、小猴、山羊

characters: hare、dog、monkey、goat

画外音：小兔子肚子饿了，她想找些东西吃。找呀，找了半天。忽然发现小路边的地里长着一根萝卜。

兔：啊，一个萝卜！一个大萝卜！我把它拔出来。

H:Oh,a radish!A big radish!I’ll pull it out.

哎——嗨——呦！哎——嗨——呦！

Ai-----Hay---Yo! Ai---Hay---Yo!

这萝卜太重了。我拔不出来。

The radish is too heavy. I can’t pull it out.

狗：我是小狗。我饿了。哦，兔小姐，你在干什么？

D: I’m a dog. I’m hungry. Oh, Miss hare,What are you doing.

兔：你好，狗先生。一个萝卜，一个大萝卜。它太重了。我拔不出来。

H:Hello,Mr.Dog.A radish,a big radish.It’s too heavy.I can’t pull it out.

狗：我帮你。咱们一起拔。

D:I’ll help you.Let’s pull it together.

兔：谢谢你。咱们一起拔。

H:Thank you .Let’s pull it together.

兔和狗：一、二、开始！哎----嗨----呦！哎---嗨---呦！哦，这萝卜太重了。我们拔不出来。

H&D:One,two,begin!Ai---Hay—Yo!Ai—Hay—Yo!Oh,the radish is too heavy.We can’t pull it out.

（小猴走了过来）

猴：我是小猴。我饿了。哦，你们在干什么？

M:I’m a monkey. I’m hungry.Oh, What are you doing?

兔和狗：你好，猴先生。一个萝卜，一个大箩卜。它太重了。我们拔不出来。

H&D:Hello,Mr. Monkey. A radish, a big radish. It’s too heauy. We can’t pull it out.

猴：我帮你们。咱们一起拔。

M:I’ll help you. Let’s pull it together.

兔和狗：谢谢你。咱们一起拔。

H&D:Thank you. Let’s pull it together.

兔，狗和猴：一，二，开始！哎---嗨---呦！哎---嗨---呦！哦，这萝卜太重了。我们拔不出来。

H,D&M:One,two,begin! Ai---Hay---Yo! Ai—Hay---Yo!Oh,the radish is too heavy. We can’t pull it out.

（小山羊走了过来）

羊：我是山羊。我饿了。哦，你们在干什么？

G:I’m a goat. I’m hungry.Oh, what are you doing?

狗、兔和猴：你好，山羊先生。一个萝卜，一个大萝卜。它太重了。我们拔不出来。

H,D&M:Hello, Mr.Goat.A radish. a big radish.It’s too heavy. We can’t pull it out.

羊：我帮你们。咱们一起拔。

G:I’ll help you. Let’s pull it together.

狗，兔和猴：谢谢你，咱们一起拔。

H,D&M:Thank you.Let’s pull it together.

兔，狗，猴和羊：一，二，开始。哎—嗨---呦！这萝卜真大，这萝卜真重。哎—嗨—呦！我们必须使劲干。我们一定把它拔出来。

H,D,M&G:One,two,begin.Ai—Hay—Yo!The radish is big.The radish is heavy. Ai---Hay—Yo! We must work hard. We must pull it out.

兔，狗，猴和羊：哎—嗨—呦！啊，萝卜拔出来了！一个大萝卜！一个重萝卜。我们大家一起吃！

H,D,M&G:Ai—Hay—Yo!Ah, the radish is out! A big radish!We’ll eat it together .A heavy radish!

（他们一起围着大萝卜唱歌，跳舞。

甲：Hello,every one, have you ever seen the movie ? Yeah, you are right, Im the director-- Cameron Diaz, applaud , thank you…Recently, I will direct a new movie called < Avatar 2 >, today, there will be a audition and I will select three actresses who can get the chance to perform in this film with famous actress---Anne Hathaway,OK, lets begin. At first , talent show, number one, lets welcome.

乙：（风情万种，妖娆妩媚地走进来，给观众一个飞吻）：oh,honey,dear,sweet,darling director, the most beautiful charming, sexy girl is coming , every body knows me, right? Yeah, Im Nicole Kidman, open your eyes as big as you can and hold your breath, there will be a unique, fantastic dance show for you, I believe that all of you will be crazy about it ,（打个响指） come some music.（搞笑舞，自由发挥）。 （跳完，鞠躬，向观众谢幕）， thank you,（面向导演）， honey, is it a wonderful performance?

甲：（作目瞪口呆状），

乙：（在甲眼前晃手），oh, darling, are you Ok?

甲：eh…my god, have you use some stimulant drugs this morning, you make my nerves nervous. Get out , next one.

乙：oh no …sweet ,you break my heart…（掩面离去）

丙：oh it seems to be serious. God bless me（画个十字架，镇定地走到甲面前，伸出手）， nice to meet you, director.

甲：（与之握手），nice to meet you too,so, introduce yourself please.

丙：Im Celine Dion, you know, I dont have too many achievements, I just won five Grammy awards, 12 World Music Awards, 7 American Music Awards , 21 Juno Awards and（做沉思状） oh, I forget it , a Oscar Award, （同学鼓掌，乙作安抚状），oh, calm down, calm down,its just a piece of cake for me ,you know, I…

甲：ok ,stop, time is limited, just begin

丙：OK!!! Ill use my first signature song to conquer you --my heart will go on, just enjoy it.

near, far, wherever you are

i believe that the heart does go on

once more, you opened the door（甲stop stop,丙不理，继续作深情状）

and youre here in my heart,

and my heart will go on and on.

甲：guard ,guard,help,drag this mad woman out.

Oh, Im dying,hope the next one will give me a surprise

丁：（对着乙的.背影，沉思状）to be,or not to be,its a question!（走到甲面前牵起她的手做亲吻状），Im glad to see you,my dear princess.

甲（做娇羞状）：oh, its really a big surprise,so whats your name?

丁：My name? Oh, wait a minute. Do you know Trish Regan?（甲，白痴的摇头），eh,its ok,then how about Robin Meade?（摇头），and Melissa Theuriau?（摇头），（丁，情绪激动），you know nothing, how can you sit in here.

甲（指门，气愤状），you you you……

丁：ok ok, it doesnt matter, you neednt learn about them, but you must know me, the most famous hostess who will catch up with those person and become the greatest poet---oprah!

甲：I dont care who you are, just show me your talent.

丁：ok ,listen,one poem,I have had found my best love, but I didn’t treasure her. When I lost her, I regret. It’s the most pain in the world. If God can give me another chance, I will say there words to her "I love you"!

甲（起鸡皮疙瘩状）：oh, I cant stand, show you the door,

丁（转身离开，继续台词）：If there is a time limit, I hope, it is （回头，对甲）10 thousand years.

甲：oh, its really a terrible ,awful, horrible day,why it is such difficult to find an excellent actress.Oh, Im dying,you three, come here,

三人跑进来，乙妩媚状：honey, you like my dance,right?

丙镇静状：director,you like my singing,right?

丁深情状：princess,you like my poet,right?

三人同声：we are past,right?

甲：ehThank you for your ehWonderful performance,but,Im sorry to tell you …（接电话） What? Nobody comes here except they three,oh…god.（挂电话，低头），you three,（抬头），pass!

三人欢呼，说：we make it,we are superstar!

乙（甜蜜状）：thats very sweet of you,we love you so much（飞个吻）

甲：you know, you are not good enough now, but Im look forward to your progress.Do you have confidence?

三人齐答：yes,we do!

甲伸手，三人搭上，同声，fight,fight,fight!

说明：绝对搞笑，绝对雷人，鉴于所花精力，所以，适当地收一点点辛苦费，第一个表演舞蹈时，音乐可以选用<猪八戒背媳妇>,第二个唱 时，一定要跑调加破音，第三个一定要足够深情恶心，就这么多提醒的，希望您看得开心，下的舒心。

人物：令狐冲（linghuchong），小师妹（little sister），任盈盈（yingying），东方不败（invincible eastern），小尼姑（little nun），田伯光（tianboguang），林平之（linpingzhi） 第一幕

（令狐冲与小师妹正在舞剑，甜蜜无比）

令狐冲：little sister ,you are the most beautful girl in this world!i will love you forever .

小师妹：（害羞）oh!really?you are the most handsome boy I have ever seen!i love you too!

令狐冲：I love you too

小师妹：I love you too too

令狐冲：I love you too too too!

（小师妹的剑不小心落下令狐冲捡起）

令狐冲：oh little sister ,your sword!

小师妹：no it’s your sword!

令狐冲：your sword!（扭扭咧咧）

小师妹：your sword!

令狐冲：your sword!

小师妹：it’s madness when I say it ,but not when you say about it! 令狐冲：ok , you are right ,it’s my sword. （顺从态）

令狐冲：little sister ,there is one thing I want to tell you ,master asked me to go downhill for a few days ,so during my absence ,brother lin will be with you ,take good care of yourself ,I will be back soon.

小师妹：rearlly?oh , my life will be boring without you!（伤感）so,good-bye!（突然兴奋）

第二幕

（令狐冲在下山后遇见正在调戏小尼姑的田伯光）

小尼姑：give away!

田伯光：come here!

小尼姑：if you talk any more nonsence, I’ll hit you with my sword! 小尼姑：keep away! keep away!

田伯光：let me take good care of you!don’t be afraid of me , I’m the most handsome man in china.

令狐冲：stop that! Don’t hurt that girl!

田伯光：who is that man?run far away if you don’t want to pass away! 令狐冲：so ,let’s fighting!（音乐，用功夫里面的那首）

（两人打斗，令狐冲不敌田伯光）

田伯光：give out that little boy!you can’t stop me from enjoying my life with her!

令狐冲：no ,if that!if that ,I’d rather die!

（再上，再被打败，重伤）

（突然闪出一人，身手凌厉，田伯光被秒掉）

小尼姑：unbelievable!he’s my hero!

东方不败：what a handsome man ,it would be a pity if you die here.and that’s why I save you ,so ,don’t fall in love with me ,forever!

令狐冲：you are a man ,how can I fall in love with you!

东方不败：but what if I ware a girl?

令狐冲：if that ,I won’t believe in love for any longer

东方不败：wait for me here!i’ll be back soon!

（熄灯，东方不败换女装）

令狐冲：you you are so beautiful! I love you

东方不败：no !we can never be together ,not because of you ,nor because of me ,it’s the world to blame!goodbey honey ,we won’t meet again.

（灯灭，第三幕）

（麻将声响起，四人麻将，分别是令狐冲，小师妹，林平之，任盈盈，令狐冲面对的是林平之）

（中文对话：

林平之：八筒

小师妹：吃

林平之：九条

小师妹：碰

林平之：五条

小师妹：杠！

令狐冲：五桶

小师妹：糊了！）

令狐冲：I lose again ,little sister ,brother lin is always help you !what’s the matter with you honey?

小师妹：so I will tell you the truth ,I am in love with brother lin ,compared with you ,he is more hot, he have strong kiss with me every now and then .but you ,have not even touch my hand during the past few years!

令狐冲：I’m so sad to hear that

任盈盈：brother linhu ,don’t be sad ,when you are longly ,I will be right by your side!

令狐冲：thank you yingying ,when everbody leave me ,you are the only one stay with me .

任盈盈：when you are longly ,I can play music for you ,so ,let us be together! I wana be your girl , and you are my boy!

令狐冲：ok,you are my girl now, do what you want to do!

（任盈盈抱住令狐冲，吻了他）

（灯灭）

（旁白：two years later ,it is said that invincible eastern was killed by linhuchong , the biggest enemy died , but the world get worse , people suffer from songshanpai . linghuchong live with renyingying from that day on , but is he happy ? who is the girl really in his heart? ）

第三幕

（非诚勿扰音乐，田伯光作为主持人，四位女嘉宾在场上端坐，分别是小师妹，小尼姑，任盈盈，东方不败，令狐冲上场）

田伯光：welcome to "no honesty no bother" I’m the compere xiaotiantian .taday there are 4 girls waiting for their boy.now let’s welcome the sunny boy linghuchong!（音乐）

令狐冲：holle everybody , I am linghuchong from huashan mountain,I’m a strong man as well as a handsome boy,you will never regret if you choose me .

田伯光：so girls , it’s time to turn down your light , to turn or not to turn it is a question

（都没有熄灯）

田伯光：it’s out of my surprise!all of the lights are on!so you can choose the girl you love best.

小师妹：brother , it was all my fault before, brother lin is no longer a real man I am so longly these days, the boy I really love is you!

小尼姑：brother , you have saved me , all my body ang heart are yours! 任盈盈：brother chong ,I am the girl who accompanied you .when you feel longly ,I played music for you .when you are happy ,I played music for you .when you are sad ,I played music for you!

令狐冲：but don’t you know I don’t love music?（径直走向东方不败，牵住她的手）

令狐冲：I thought you have passed away, it is so good to see you again 东方不败：I was saved by your master fengqingyang （停顿）。You wanted to kill me ,why choose me now?

令狐冲：I did’t want you know?it was not decide by me !belive in me ,you are the girl in my heart ! whether past or present!

东方不败：I won’t belive in you any more , you have so many female friends ,any of them can be your girl friend , isn’t it?

令狐冲：the girl you love is not the one who grow up with you ,nor the one who like you ,nor the one who play music for you ! she is the one you feel right ,and that is the most important.belive that you will always be my girl!

东方不败：thank you for your love , which I can’t afford to.we can never be together, it is decide by God . I will not marry you , nor see you again .so ,it is the last time we see each other .choose the one you like best and be kind to her .

Good-bye